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Waiting Well: A Lesson in Patience
Waiting is seldom easy. In fact, it can be downright difficult. But, it’s always possible. I know it doesn’t feel that way at the moment, but let’s take our feelings…
I have a feeling you’ll be able to relate to some of this, sister…
When we were kids, we couldn’t wait to be teenagers. As teenagers, we couldn’t wait to drive, and then one day become adults. Maybe if you’re currently single, you desire to be married. Or perhaps you’re waiting to have kids. One day, you’ll be waiting for those kids to have kids so you can become a grandparent!
Or, more solemnly, perhaps it’s your prodigal child who’s turned his heart from the Lord, that you’re prayerfully waiting to return. Possibly, you’re waiting for the test results to come back so the doctor can determine an official diagnosis. Or, you’re waiting for a breakthrough in the difficulties enveloping your marriage.
Waiting is seldom easy. In fact, it can be downright difficult. But, it’s always possible– it truly is. I know it doesn’t feel that way at the moment, but let’s take our feelings off of the table for the time being, shall we? As women, we often focus too much on how we feel in a particular situation, and allow those emotions to determine how we navigate the waters. This is true for so many areas of our lives, but particularly true when we’re waiting; when we’re doing our best to be patient.
As a Christian, patience is a key character trait in our faith. Our goal should be to patiently endure as Christ did. We are called to be patient with others, patient with the Lord as we wait on Him, and to let patience have its perfect work within us (James 1:4). We have the Holy Spirit in us, guiding and directing our steps– but we must be still and listen. We can have patience as we allow Him to work in us in the hard times– the times of waiting for days, weeks, or even years. We can choose to fret or to wait patiently for the God who is sovereign over our lives (Psalm 37:7).
What is patience?
Cambridge Dictionary defines patience as “the ability to wait, or to continue doing something despite difficulties, or to suffer without complaining or becoming annoyed.”
Often, in various translations of the Bible, patience is called “longsuffering”. It’s the idea of being able to suffer long; however, not just for a long time, but to also suffer well. Patience is the opposite of quick anger and loss of control. There is a strength that we exude when we operate in patience, and on the contrary, a weakness when we react impatiently.
If you’ve been following our Godly Woman Wardrobe series, you know that patience (or longsuffering) is the 5th character trait we are to put on according to Colossians 3:12-14.
“Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection. ”
We can be patient and endure because of the hope we have in Christ (1 Thessalonians 1:3). Patience is a flex of our endurance muscle, giving us the ability to wait on the Lord’s timing, trust in the Lord’s goodness, and believe the outcome of our trials will be for our good and His glory. Endurance takes faith—not passivity— to work. In faith, we can be still and allow God to be God in our lives.
And of course, sister, what is patience if not one of the beautiful pieces of the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22). Through the sanctification process, as the Spirit is at work in our lives changing us to be more and more like Christ, we ever increasingly live and breathe the character of God. In obedience to the Holy Spirit and His promptings, we can then exhibit patience, even in the toughest moments and circumstances.
How to be patient
In terms of discovering how to be patient, keep in mind that, like any other aspect of our faith, patience isn’t a one-size-fits-all character trait. God will provide different situations in the lives of each of us to help us grow in patience. What circumstances that cause me to learn how to have more patience may look drastically different than the situations that cause you to flex your endurance. Let us not compare; instead, let us be mindful of the things of God: His personalized, customized working of sanctification in us, and walk worthy of the particular calling He has set before us.
As we look at these five, general ways to slow down, take a step back, and be mindful of our growth in patience, we can do so knowing that the Lord will give each of us the strength and endurance due to us so that we can glorify Him in the process.
Please note: There are so many ways to learn how to be patient. You could likely come up with your own list of five! I encourage you to comb through the Scriptures and discover all of the Bible verses about patience. To get you started, here are a few things the Lord has laid on my heart.
#1: Wait on the Lord.
Wait on the Lord; be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart; wait, I say, on the Lord! -Psalm 27:14 NKJV
Not long after becoming a stay-at-home mom, I felt the Lord telling us it was time to have a 3rd child. After getting pregnant fairly quickly, I had a miscarriage. If you’ve ever experienced a miscarriage, or know someone who has, you know how difficult it is. For me, the next part of the equation was very trying as well– waiting to get pregnant again. This had never been something I struggled with before (and I know many who have, so believe me, I do not take this for granted and am very thankful), so it became a very confusing time for me. I began wondering if my body was still working correctly and why it would take so long when I knew it was the Lord who had placed the desire on my heart to have another child. Why was He withholding?
I had so many questions throughout the year that it took me to conceive again, and I truly had to dig deep to walk out the words of this verse. To be of good courage; to wait; to allow Him to strengthen my heart– these were all things I could not do on my own. When my fleshly thoughts wanted to take over, I had to remember that His words do not return void and He is the Ultimate Promisekeeper. Recalling the truth of His character helped me to endure in hope during that time. And, while I waited, He reminded me that He is my portion, and all I need (Lamentations 3:24).
#2: Be patient in affliction.
Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. — Romans 12:12 ESV
Did you know you have something in common with Moses, Abraham, Job, Paul (and many others in the Bible)? It’s easily summed up in one word: TRIALS! Trials and storms will come in this life; there is no question about it (John 16:33). In my opinion, knowing this truth reminds me that there is no use trying to avoid tough times and tribulations– they’ll find us anyway!
God, being the gracious, loving, and sovereign Father He is, gives us the strength we need to be patient and stand firm, even in affliction. Amid our tribulations, we can fix our eyes on the Lord, trusting Him to take care of all we need as He leads us through. Patience in affliction comes via trust in Him, prayer, and steadfastness to keep His Word.
#3: Be patient in relationships.
Now we exhort you, brethren, warn those who are unruly, comfort the fainthearted, uphold the weak, be patient with all. — 1 Thessalonians 5:14 NKJV
Whether our spouse, kids, co-workers, or brothers and sisters in Christ, we are called to be patient with all. And, if you weren’t sure, all means all. :) That includes those who are unruly– a little stubborn in their opinions or perhaps even argumentative. We’re told we should, as the Thessalonians we also instructed, warn or admonish them firmly and gently– in a way that still is loving. We sprinkle our words with grace and truth, and honor Christ in the way we respond, react, and instruct.
What about comforting the fainthearted– those who, as it means in the original Greek, are “little spirited” or “feebleminded.” We can easily lose our patience with friends or family who don’t get it; or those fellow Christians who may have weaker confidence in the things of the Lord. Yet this is where we’re called to walk slowly; take a seat, and encourage. Drop back to their pace and run alongside them, helping them grow and come to understand the things you hope in on a deeper level.
RELATED: How to Encourage One Another Like Barnabas
And then, as the verse above also states, we’re to uphold the weak. Whether physically, mentally, or perhaps weaker and less firm in their faith– as the Lord upholds us, we’re in turn to do the same for others. There’s no good reason to expect too much from them– give them grace and time to seek the Lord for themselves as well. We can show Christ’s love as we care for, hold fast to, or support those who are more feeble.
Being “patient with all” writes the story not only of how we treat those who need our support, but also of how we respond to others when we’re the ones who are not encouraged, upheld, and comforted, but instead, slandered or insulted. Patience can be tasted on our tongue as we give a soft answer instead of wrath (Proverbs 15:1); felt in our mind as we think before we speak (Proverbs 15:28); or perhaps palpable in our being as we’re slow to anger (Proverbs 14:29).
25 Pro Tips for Patience in Relationships
How to be patient…when you’re tired, you don’t feel like it, or when it’s hard. These are all things we face as we navigate our relationships with others. You’re not alone, sister and the Bible offers us so much wisdom on this topic! Here’s a FREE guide with 25 simple, yet in-depth tips based on Romans 12. Fill out the form below.
#4: Show patience in serving.
And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all, especially to those who are of the household of faith. -Galatians 6:9-10 NKJV
Things may not always shape up in the way we expect them to, especially when it comes to serving others, but we can trust the Lord that if we are surely operating inside of His will, our serving will not be in vain. Therefore, no matter what it looks like, we focus on the “doing good” and not the “weary”. This proper focus allows our gaze to be fixed on the truth that there is always a season coming, whereas what the Lord purposes for us will be reaped.
It can be hard. It can be tiring. It can stretch our patience. But, our serving others, especially those who are of the household of faith, is never in vain, sister. The Lord desires to use us to do particular works that He ordained for us before the foundation of the world, and our job is to simply, trust, obey, and walk patiently in them. Our strength comes from the Lord, so when those thoughts of weariness come, as long as we’re doing what He’s called us to do, we can wait well for our due season, honoring Him along the way as we take the opportunities He’s given us to do good to all. (Don’t forget, all means all!).
#5: Slow down and learn patience from the Best.
The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. — Psalm 103:8 NASB
The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not willing for any to perish, but for all to come to repentance. — 2 Peter 3:9 NASB
The beautiful thing about patience (and all other godly characteristics) is that we don’t have to pull it out of thin air and fabricate it ourselves. Patience, just like the rest of the Godly Woman Wardrobe, comes from the Lord! God is love, and love is patient (1 Corinthians 13:4). In His greatest act of love He sent His Son to die on the cross for our sins so that through Jesus, we could be reconciled back to God. And in His great patience, He desires all to come to repentance, not wanting anyone to perish. As we wade the waters of relationships, trials, and service, we need to look no further than our Great Example.
We can wait faithfully for His timing because He is always faithful.
We can be still and patiently listen for Him because His still small voice is always there when we seek Him.
We can trust in His promises because He is not slack to keep them.
We can wait patiently for the Lord because His sovereign timing is always precise.
What is patience, if the Lord isn’t in it?
Sister, let me now encourage, uphold, and comfort you! Let us no longer question or wonder ‘how to be patient’. We keep our eyes focused on the Lord, remembering that patience isn’t just a “thing” to be possessed. In other words, we’re not to just have patience. None of the fruit of the Spirit and any other godly characteristic is something to simply have or hold onto. We must walk it out; use it. We show patience in our behaviors, our actions, our words, and responses, as the Lord does in our lives. What He does in us and through us, and more importantly, what we have in Him is enough.
“The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “Therefore I have hope in Him.” The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the person who seeks Him. -Lamentations 3:24-25 NASB
What about you? Do you struggle with patience or does having patience come easily to you? Comment below and let me know!
Missed the intro to the Godly Woman Wardrobe? Find out what Christian women should wear, here.
Blessed Are the Meek...Are You?
What is meekness? And why is it that blessed are the meek? Meekness is a lot of things, but one thing it’s not is…
I don’t really recall ever hearing my dad yell at me or my three siblings while growing up. Sure, he was stern and authoritative when he needed to discipline us, but I don’t remember him ever flying off the handle. I’ve always had a deep respect for my dad, a respect that led me to never want to disappoint him— not out of fear, but because he doesn’t deserve to be disappointed. He displayed and communicated right from wrong to us as children, constantly went out of his way to do what needed to be done for all of us (and my mom), and didn’t retaliate, fight back, or try to get even if someone ever had a problem with him.
And he’s still this way today. Soft-spoken, kind, and I honestly can’t think of one person in this world who doesn’t like him.
Do you know anyone like that? Someone who you can describe in one, powerful word: meek.
“Meekness is weakness.” You may have heard that saying before. Or, perhaps no one has said those exact words to you, but you've got the vibe that that's the general consensus of our culture.
In today’s world, a meek and gentle spirit is often mistaken for weakness. A lack of strength. Powerless. Even, being a push-over. We're told to be strong, show everyone how much of an independent woman we are, and how we “don't need anybody.” Use our words, actions, and body language to exert power and force; take control, they say.
But is this the most effective behavior? I mean, sure, it gets the job done. People respond to fear, so if they're afraid of the big, strong woman you are— of course, you can make them do almost anything you want.
But, as a woman set apart for the Lord is this the life He calls you to?
This post contains affiliate links, which means if you make a purchase, I receive a small commission. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. This is at no extra cost to you, and helps me to further serve you in your walk with the Lord!
WHAT IS MEEKNESS?
Meekness is the willingness to suffer injury or insult rather than be the one to inflict those insults on others. It produces a mildness in our demeanor and humility in our spirit. Meekness does not grasp for ways to overpower others or seek to be overbearing. There is a gentle, somewhat submissive quality to a person who is meek.
If you’ve been following our Godly Woman Wardrobe series, you know that meekness is the 4th character trait we are to put on according to Colossians 3:12-14.
“Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection. ”
When we are meek, even if our natural personality tends to be on the stronger side, we choose to yield that powerfulness and instead speak and behave with gentleness for the benefit of others.
Meekness is strength under control.
It’s like what Paul urged the church of Ephesus— to display a lowliness and gentleness; to have patience and bear with one another in love. This is meekness and a worthy way of walking out our faith (Ephesians 4:1-2).
MEEKNESS IN THE BIBLE
Of course, like any good thing in life, we need to look no further than Jesus for our example of meekness. The Son of God, who left His place in heaven in order to come down and dwell among us, had every right to use His almighty power as He interacted with people. He was questioned, religious leaders tried to deceive Him, and He was provoked. Yet, He always responded with a meekness, never putting the full weight of His power at the forefront.
He showed His strength in teaching the truth, not in starting arguments. He was bold enough to confront wrong behavior in people, yet gentle enough not to strike them down. Those in His presence felt the weight of His authority (Mark 1:21-22), but He didn’t lord it over them. He came to earth for the people— for us— not to put His deity on display.
In 2 Corinthians 10:1, Paul, as he prepares to share some hard things with the readers of his epistle, urges the Corinthians “by the meekness and gentleness of Christ.” He desires to boldly share the tough, necessary things they need to hear in a gentle, strength-controlled manner— just as Jesus did.
Even Paul’s personality seemed to reflect a meekness, as, in the same verse, he goes on to say that he was meek when physically in their presence, but bold in his writings to them. Perhaps they thought he was hypocritical or two-faced. Or perhaps— they just didn’t quite understand what true meekness looked like.
Going back even further in time, we meet Moses, whom Numbers 12:3 says was very meek (or humble; or lowly), more so than anyone on the earth. The leader of the exodus learned how to hone that strong passion (that once led him to kill an Egyptian) into a quiet strength that would humbly and obediently walk in step with his God.
Meekness in our lives
So, what about us? What is meekness for us as Christian women, and how does it translate into our own lives? We often think that biblical principles are supposed to look differently for us in today’s world; in our current culture. But sister, God never changes and neither does His Word. So the direction and instruction we read in the Bible apply to us in the same way it applied to those living in those times. With a careful study of the Word, you can find many ways the Lord instructs us in how to live with an attitude of meekness. What is meekness? Dare I say, it conveys strength. Here are just a few thoughts:
#1: Meekness means submitting to God.
We humbly bow to His Word and His will, recognizing that there is no power that we could possess on our own that would fruitfully bring forth the will of God.
#2: Meekness means we let go of our rights.
We realize that our “logical” privileges and rights aren’t greater than our calling as a child of God. Our earthly prestige may bring us fame and attention in this life, but He has so much more for us. We live in a way that knows this to be true, not in a manner that ensures we’re placed on a pedestal above those “lower” than us.
“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.”
#3: In meekness, we see strength in patience.
We know that even though we’re giving up our privileges and rights now, in our meekness and faithfulness to the Lord, we will inherit the earth. He’s got us. He cares for us. Our meek and mild attitude is not overlooked by Him. His reward is great for those who wait on Him, whether for His enactment of vengeance or simply for direction.
#4: In meekness, we share the truth with love and grace.
We should always be ready to communicate the source of our hope and shed light on our faith, but we do so with meekness— a gentle strength that exudes the power behind the gospel, but in a loving way that allows the hearer to feel the Holy Spirit’s conviction, not our condemnation (1 Peter 3:15).
STUDY EXAMPLES OF MEEKNESS IN THE BIBLE
God has given us all that’s needed to live a godly life– the answers are found in His Word! Let’s be women who live with meekness, humbly submitting to His blueprint for our lives. Use this FREE Bible study printables packet to aid you during your quiet time. Fill out the form below.
Blessed are the Meek, Sister
Honoring the Lord is not weak. It doesn’t mean we are less than. It takes more strength to refrain from unleashing the power you have than to actually unleash it. Like a well-trained horse, we know when to humbly submit and how to respond at the moment. Was this not, in fact, the example of our Lord?
There is no need to strive or to pursue a life of power so that our power can cause all things to work together for good for ourselves. No— that is the Lord’s job. Instead, as we allow ourselves to be enveloped with His gentleness, we can rest in His peace, knowing that He will make a way, in His own way. We simply need to trust and be obedient.
Meekness brings forth blessings— not only for you but for those who witness the love of Christ through your gentleness and respect.
Blessed are the meek.
Be blessed, sister!
Bible verses about meekness
Use your FREE Bible Study Printables (see download form above!) and find your own list of Bible verses about meekness! Here are just a handful to get you started. I encourage your to write them down in a favorite journal (here’s my favorite!) so you can be reminded when you need it.
Psalm 37:11 NKJV
But the meek shall inherit the earth, and shall delight themselves in the abundance of peace.
James 1:21 NKJV
Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overflow of wickedness, and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls.
James 3:13 NKJV
Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show by good conduct that his works are done in the meekness of wisdom.
1 Peter 3:15 NKJV
But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear.
Ephesians 4:1-2 NKJV
I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called, with all lowliness and gentleness, with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love;
2 Corinthians 10:1 NASB
Now I, Paul, myself urge you by the meekness and gentleness of Christ—I who am meek when face to face with you, but bold toward you when absent!
See also:
A Biblical Guide to Humility
What does it mean to humble yourself? It starts by adopting the same attitude– heart attitude– that Jesus had. Are we willing to choose…
“I’m the most humble person”…said no one ever. At least, no one who’s ever really thought about what they were saying, right?
Humility isn’t something you walk around telling everyone that you have. Most of the time, if that’s the case, that person typically doesn’t possess strong humility (if he has to tell everyone he’s a king, is he really…?) You get my drift?
Humility is a way of life– just like the other pieces of the Godly Woman Wardrobe, it’s who you are; how you live. But, as with the other pieces, it’s also a choice– a choice whether or not you will put on each article of clothing on a daily basis.
Sister, in an effort to humble yourself, just know that you can’t possess true humility outside of the Lord.
“Therefore, as [the] elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility…”
In Colossians 3:12, the word humility in Greek means “humbleness of mind or lowliness of mind”, and it’s the same word used in Ephesians 4:2, Philippians 2:3, and 1 Peter 5:5.
It is in this attitude of the heart that we came before the Lord, admitting that we were sinners, repenting, and asking Him to be our Savior. As new creations in Christ, the elect of God, holy and beloved, it is our duty to continue in this heart attitude of humility. As Jesus did during His time on earth, we are to walk out our faith in a way that gives glory to God; and, that is possible if we are clothed in humility.
This post contains affiliate links, which means if you make a purchase, I receive a small commission. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. This is at no extra cost to you, and helps me to further serve you in your walk with the Lord!
An Example of Humility in the Bible
Grab your Bible and read Philippians 2:1-9 right now. Will you do that? It’s such a powerful passage that not only lets us know how we are to act but also why we are to act this way. It’s worth the read to understand just what we’re talking about here.
There are many examples of humility in the Bible when it comes to Jesus, but for now, in light of this passage, let’s focus on His ultimate act of humility. Jesus laid aside all He had in the heavenly places for a time, to come down to earth, to dwell among men– living, suffering, and dying for us. Philippians 2:7 says He made Himself of no reputation. He took on flesh, became a servant, and lived a humble life– one that led Him, in humble submission and obedience, to the cross.
You taste His humility when you think about the fact that He was born in a manger and born to parents who weren’t wealthy, living lavishly in a palace. Even Moses was raised in a wealthier lifestyle than Jesus while growing up!
Yet, Jesus didn’t seek those things for Himself; He didn’t try to elevate Himself or His status. He wasn’t trying to pursue a rags to riches story in this life. Don’t get me wrong— there’s nothing wrong with wanting to get out of poverty and create a better, more stable lifestyle for your family. My point is that Jesus was obedient to the Father’s will for His life, and He was willing to be born, live, and die in whatever way would bring about the plans and purposes of God and give Him the glory.
Of course, one of the most “famous” examples of humility in the Bible is when Jesus washed the feet of His disciples (John 13). A lowly, dirty job usually done by someone’s servant, Jesus instead took this task upon Himself. He wasn’t too high and mighty; it wasn’t beneath Him.
Jesus– the Son of the Godhead, humbled Himself. He didn’t have to, yet in the love of God– His great, unending, unfathomable love– God sent Jesus to die for our sins. As Christians, we are to be like Christ. He is our example and by the power of the Holy Spirit, as we follow His promptings, we too can live a life of humility.
And for us, what does that look like? What does it mean to humble? It starts with adopting the same attitude– heart attitude– that Jesus had. Are we willing to choose to take on humility– not just in our actions, but in our being? This is the example of Christ. Once we do, then the verses prior to Philippians 2:7 are a little easier to walk out.
“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.”
We’ll dissect these verses more in a minute, but for the time being, think about your day. Did the instruction of these verses ring true in your actions so far today? Were you selfishly completing tasks or unselfishly serving others? Did you look out more for others’ interests, or your own? (I’m asking myself the same questions right now, sister!)
RELATED: 3 Lessons on Humble Submissions
As we consider our heart attitude and ask the Lord to search our hearts and expose any wicked way within us, our pure intentions and motives come to light. It may not be pretty, but it is necessary because humility can’t fully manifest if we’re still holding onto ounces of pride.
Pride Goes Before a Fall
What is pride? Well, put simply, it’s not humility! Whereas we won’t spend a lot of time discussing pride in this article, it’s important to touch on it for a quick minute. We want to be sure that as we’re pursuing a life clothed in humility, we are aware of the ways pride can manifest in our lives.
“Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall. ”
If you’ve peeked around on my blog, you may have noticed that I’ve already written an article that answers the question, What is pride? Although the majority of that article was written specifically in regard to motherhood, pride, as you know, is something that can creep into every area of a Christian woman’s life.
It’s so easy to focus more on ourselves, our own agendas, and our wants. This can be fulfilling for a time, and we may even be satisfied with the outcome. Yet, things won’t go well for long if this is the normal way we conduct our lives. When we’re too focused on ourselves (whether we think we are so great or so little) we are not focused enough on the Lord. We believe we can do it all on our own, in our own strength. Or, we believe that we can’t do anything at all, so what’s the point?
Pride hinders us from fully trusting in the Lord and walking by faith.
In faith, we realize that His power is made perfect in our weakness, so it doesn’t matter if we aren’t good enough. And, faith shows us that no matter how skilled we are, we still need Him through the process to guide us, direct us, and keep our eyes focused on glorifying Him in the outcome.
RELATED: Dealing with the Idol of Self
Humble Yourself
The beautiful thing about humility is that it is easily done by way of submission. Some of you may be thinking, submission? Why is that beautiful? I know, sometimes we struggle with this word; especially as women living in today’s culture where we’re told to take charge, be in control, and be a queen. Unfortunately, this attitude of a culture-approved worldview is saved for the prideful and as Christian women, we shouldn’t want any part of that.
Submission is a beautiful thing because it puts us in a place where we know we are under the guidance, care, and leadership of a higher authority. And, if this authority is trustworthy and truthful, we have nothing to fear.
Sister, this is our Lord. Even as married women being that the Lord calls us to submit to our husbands, we do this as unto Christ. Godly submission always trails back to Him, as the Higher, Trustworthy, and Truthful Authority. When we see Him in this respect, and in that respect we respect those on earth He has placed in leadership over us, we can then willingly be clothed in humility. Our pride will relinquish and we won’t be bucking at the system because we know that it’s the Lord’s system and we trust Him. We understand that His hand is indeed mighty, and we can trust His mighty hand with any care we may have.
When we’re clothed with humility, others see a gentle radiance exude from our lives. We happily serve in the lowest of ways, as Jesus did when He washed His disciples' feet; we don’t care if we go unnoticed; we don’t expect to always get a ‘thank you’; and we think of others first, over self.
“If you are willing to be nothing God will make something of you. The way to the top of the ladder is to begin at the lowest round. In fact in the church of God, the way up is to go down; but he that is ambitious to be at the top will find himself before long at the bottom.”
With humility comes grace (1 Peter 5:5). Who doesn’t want more of God’s grace? Grace is amazing because it has nothing to do with us— it all stems from God and His character. It’s a blessing and promise from God for those who are humble.
And secondly, with humility comes exaltation (1 Peter 5:6). In due time— God’s timing— He exalts us, in whatever way or fashion He desires in His sovereignty. Yet, if we’re on a path determined to exalt ourselves, this is the path of pride, and there will be resistance. We must trust and believe that the Lord cares for us enough that all things will work out for our good and His glory.
FIND TRUE EXAMPLES OF HUMILITY IN THE WORD
Sister, we can make up our life as we go along, or we can follow the blueprint God has provided for us. Let’s be women who live purposefully for the Lord by way of being intentional in our study of Him! Use this FREE printable study packet to aid you during your quiet time before the Lord. Fill out the form below.
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How to Humble Yourself
Through the power of the Holy Spirit, we can choose, daily, to clothe ourselves with humility. As with many things in the Christian life– it’s easier said than done. As I mentioned earlier, Philippians 2 gives us a little bit of insight into how we can practically walk out this calling in our lives. Write it in your personal journal and refer to it often. Let’s read it again:
“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.”
#1: Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit.
First of all, sister, nothing means nothing. There is not one thing, ever, that we should do with selfish ambition or conceit (a highly favorable opinion of yourself). Yes, we can be ambitious for the Lord– striving to live a life pleasing to Him, to serve Him with all we have, and to be faithful to the calling He’s given us. An ambition that is focused toward God is ok. It’s the ambition that is selfish, however, that is not ok. When we’re concerned with our own promotion and advancement, thinking only of how things will work out for us–this is what the world means when they say, “Look out for #1.”
We don’t have to live this way– bowing down to what we believe is best for only us. The Lord has a better way and His way works together for good to those who are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28)– not just for some of us, all of us! At the same time! This is why God’s sovereignty is so important for us to keep in mind. His ways are higher than our ways and we don’t know the end from the beginning. The best we can and should do is to remove selfish ambition and conceit from our wardrobe and humble ourselves before Him, knowing that He will promote us in due time.
#2: In lowliness of mind, esteem others better than yourself.
Our job as Christian women is not to walk around thinking we are better than any one person (or everyone else). Relinquish high self-esteem and superiority at the foot of the cross. Again, this gentle, meek, lowliness of mind is the attitude Jesus possessed during His time on earth.
What does this look like for us?
It means we see each other as made in the image of God.
We don’t look down on someone who struggles financially or who doesn’t have shoes as nice as ours.
We see opportunities where our strengths can complement a sister’s weaknesses, and vice versa.
No one is below us, and honestly, we don’t put people on idol-like pedestals thinking there are so high above us either.
The Lord places each of us in positions according to His will, and that’s His business. As we esteem others as better, this means we see others as unique creations of our Heavenly Father with desires, needs, and struggles. We’re not so focused on ourselves that we miss it. And in our lowliness of mind, we are ready to graciously and humbly stoop down to serve them. When we all do this for one another, this creates greater love and unity in the body of Christ.
#3: Look out for the interest of others.
We should not miss the fact that this verse doesn’t say that we are to ONLY look out for the interest of others– it does say that we’re to look out for our own interests too. So we should still, of course, care about our lives, our families, and the calling the Lord has for us. Yet, is not to be our one and only concern. Again, with too much pride, selfish ambition, and conceit, we’re toeing the line of looking out for #1.
Instead, as we remove the negative pieces of our wardrobe, looking out for the interest of others comes naturally. When the Lord’s ways are above ours, we see others as made in the image of God. And, when we desire to serve them in their needs, by default we begin to possess more of an attitude that looks out for the interest of others. When I say “by default”, I don’t mean that it’ll happen 100% of the time on its own–no, it’s still our choice, sister! Yet, how much easier will it be, when we’re clothed in humility, to look out for others and want what’s best for them, just as the Lord does?
It takes a conscious effort and decision, a moment-by-moment reliance on the Holy Spirit. And, oh what beauty comes when we do so.
Bible Verses About Humility
There are so many stories in the Bible that focus on those who were humble and then exalted by God, and those who exalted themselves and therefore were humbled by God (just read the book of Daniel!). We have many examples to learn from, sister. But for now, I’ll leave you with a few Bible verses about humility:
Ephesians 4:2 NKJV: “…with all lowliness and gentleness, with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love.”
Philippians 2:3 NKJV: “Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.”
1 Peter 5:5 NKJV: “Likewise you younger people, submit yourselves to your elders. Yes, all of you be submissive to one another, and be clothed with humility, for “God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”’
1 Peter 5:6-7 NKJV: “Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.”
Job 42:1-6 NASB: “Then Job answered the Lord and said, ‘“I know that You can do all things, and that no plan is impossible for You. ‘Who is this who conceals advice without knowledge?’ Therefore I have declared that which I did not understand, things too wonderful for me, which I do not know. ‘Please listen, and I will speak; I will ask You, and You instruct me.’ I have heard of You by the hearing of the ear; but now my eye sees You; therefore I retract, and I repent, sitting on dust and ashes.”’
James 4:10: “Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up.”
Deuteronomy 8:2 NKJV: “And you shall remember that the Lord your God led you all the way these forty years in the wilderness, to humble you and test you, to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep His commandments or not.”
2 Samuel 22:28 NKJV: “You will save the humble people; but Your eyes are on the haughty, that You may bring them down.”
2 Chronicles 7:14 NKJV: “If My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land.”
2 Chronicles 32:26 NKJV: “Then Hezekiah humbled himself for the pride of his heart, he and the inhabitants of Jerusalem, so that the wrath of the Lord did not come upon them in the days of Hezekiah.”
Psalm 18:27 NKJV: “For You will save the humble people, but will bring down haughty looks.”
Proverbs 3:34 NKJV: “Surely He scorns the scornful, but gives grace to the humble.”
Do you have others that are your favorites? Comment below!
Clothed in Kindness: 4 Biblical Ways to Be Kind
Kindness is goodness towards others that involves your whole being and mellows any harshness within you. So, it’s not just being kind to someone…
Did you know that as a Christian woman, you have a lot? I don’t know about you, but I often forget that. I feel I have little, whether it’s money, possessions, or the right tools to “get it done.” Sometimes this may be true— we all go through seasons of plenty and seasons of lack. Nevertheless, all the time we really do have all things— all the things that matter, anyway.
2 Peter 1:3 tells us that God has given us all things that pertain to life and godliness. All things. All things we need to live life and live a godly life. I’ll say it again, all things.
“Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord, as His divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by glory and virtue, by which have been given to us exceedingly great and precious promises, that through these you may be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust. But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, to godliness brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness love. For if these things are yours and abound, you will be neither barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. ”
This happens through the knowledge of Him. We come to know Him through spending time with Him in prayer and our quiet times— and through that knowledge, in His divine power, we have all things we need to walk out our faith.
As partakers of this divine nature, we have put off our old ways, and put on, in all diligence, His ways— faith, virtue, knowledge, self-control, brotherly kindness, and the like.
The keyword here is diligence. The Lord gives us these things, but it takes diligence on our part— it takes a decision— to continually choose to put on these traits and live them out in our lives. It’s not passive. Just as we may have hangers of clothes in our closets, indeed we have clothes, yet we must make the decision to put them on in order to make them useful and effective in our lives. When we add these godly traits to our faith, we glorify God in our words, deeds, and life.
Colossians 3 tells us about 7 specific traits– what I like to call the Godly Woman Wardrobe. If you haven’t read the synopsis of these traits, start here: 7 Things Every Christian Woman Should Wear
Are you ready to step into the new? Today we’re looking at trait #2: Kindness.
What is kindness?
Kindness is compassion in action. Whereas compassion could simply be the feeling we have towards another in need— a sympathetic or empathetic thought or feeling— kindness is that feeling put into action. We don’t just look upon one who is suffering and feel sorry for them or feel their pain, we actually step in and do something about it.
“Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness… ”
Kindness is an action. It’s the right words, the right gestures, and the right deeds. It communicates God’s love sincerely and plainly. Kindness has to be done and shown to another person.
RELATED: Part 1, The Godly Woman Wardrobe: 5 Ways to Show Compassion
Kindness is goodness towards others that involves your whole being and mellows any harshness within you. So, it’s not just being kind to someone—it’s that your BEING is kind. This means that it’s more than having good manners, right? Even the rudest of people can choose to have good manners when they want to. But, showing kindness is more than that.
Of course, as with any good thing, the example of kindness that we have comes from God Himself. So let’s take a look at His ultimate kindness so we can understand it a little bit better.
Kindness in the Bible
When we consider taking a tour through all the examples of kindness in the Bible, God’s kindness should be the first pit stop that we make. As the Maker of all things, He created kindness and embodies all there is to it. We need to look no further than who He is. Although we could pull many saints’ examples from Scripture, today we’re just going to focus on the One from who it all stems.
God’s ultimate kindness came in the form of the salvation He offers us. Even in our lowest and worst state, in our sin, His love still broke through and in His mercy and kindness He offered us a beautiful, free gift. This, of course, has nothing to do with us– we did nothing. We did not and cannot save ourselves. This is based on who He is, according to His mercy, faithfulness, and love.
“But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, that having been justified by His grace we should become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.”
In God’s kindness, goodness, and grace, He offers salvation to all— the Jew and the Gentile. We have been adopted and grafted into His beloved people, and we can choose to accept and remain in that kindness (Romans 11:22).
Yet in all of this, we shouldn’t think there is anything superior or special about us because we have experienced the kindness of God. God’s kindness is for everyone, for all. In the same respect, we also shouldn’t take it lightly. Despite our past, present, and future sins, He still remains faithful in His kindness toward us. For believers, in Christ, He no longer condemns us for past sins and doesn’t judge us for our current sins and future sins. For unbelievers, His kindness isn’t Him being slack– it’s meant to draw them to repentance. Thank God for the kindness He shows through His restraint, mercy, and patience (Romans 2:4).
What about us, sister? Can we show the same restraint, mercy, patience, and love in our lives?
A Kind Person: Are You?
As Christian women, kindness is something that should permeate our being. It’s not that we just choose to be kind in various situations, but the entire representation of our being should be that we are kind– who we are, at our core, is kindness. Titus 3:1 tells us that we should be ready for every good deed. This means that we aren’t sleeping on our kindness, sister! It’s a natural flow– we see a need, we fill it; we recognize that someone needs love, and we give it– simply because that’s who we are. We’re always ready, willing, and able.
The second verse of Titus 3 goes on to tell us specifically how kindness manifests itself in the life of a believer:
…to slander no one, not to be contentious, to be gentle, showing every consideration for all people. -Titus 3:2 NASB
Kindness, as our being, means we have a gentle and quiet spirit (1 Peter 3:4). We don’t slander or strive to cause division and contention with others; it’s just not who we are. And how do we do all this? By “showing every consideration for all people.” We see others how the Lord sees them, through His lens and perspective, not ours. When this is our vantage point, we can’t help but see the woman next to us as a fellow person, created in the image of God, just like we are. We can’t help to realize that our sister in Christ, even with her flaws, is still holy, blameless, and beloved, just as we are (in all of our flaws!).
Sister, when you adopt His kindness as your own and it rules your being, then being kind is absolutely the only logical thing that makes sense. You can truly be a kind person because His power working through you gives you the grace, patience, wisdom, and self-control to be so.
How to Be Kind: 4 Biblical Principles
Showing kindness isn’t a huge feat when we’re walking step-in-step with the Spirit. Here are 4 practical and biblical ways that you can show kindness as you walk out your faith.
#1: Show kindness through the things you do.
My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth. -NKJV
You show kindness when you do things for others without expecting anything in return. You look out for others, offer a lending hand, and walk out the truth of the Word. One way to do this is to be the hands and feet of Jesus— you can share His truth by words, yes, but you must also share the truth of His character and His love (for all of us) by your deeds.
This goes for your enemies (Luke 6:35) and your friends, especially those who are of the household of faith (Galatians 6:10).
So, make that meal, offer to babysit, help her to her car, and don’t repay evil for evil. So much can be conveyed about our Lord by our actions.
The Lord leads the way in Kindness: Free 5-Day Devotional
Do you need to remember all God has done for you? Often, we don’t take the time to sit and reflect on His provision. Nevertheless, He keeps providing, doesn’t He? Download this new, 5-day devotional study, look back, and remember the goodness He has lavished in your life in the areas of your faith, marriage, motherhood, home, and finances. Then, open your eyes to all He is doing for you right now. Fill out the form below.
#2: Be kind with your words.
She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness. -Proverbs 31:26 NKJV
What does your speech sound like? Is kindness on your tongue all the time– in easy and hard situations? Even when you don’t agree with someone? Words are powerful and speak volumes about what’s in our hearts. The Word tells us to be sure what we have is edifying and imparts grace to the hearers (Ephesians 4:29). This is possible when we’re walking by the Spirit and being mindful of what He wants us to say in any given situation.
But, speaking kindly can also be a planned, intentional decision. Look for nice things to say to a sister– about her new haircut, her outfit, or the way she handled a particular situation. Are you thankful for the way she shared her talent or gift with you or others? Say so. Be a noticer and someone who speaks up. Kind words will be remembered.
#3: Put others above self.
Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another. -Romans 12:10 NKJV
We live in a world that says it’s acceptable to put yourself first. All the time, just look out for #1. Yet, this isn’t the way that Jesus lived. He always sought the needs of others first and took care of those around Him. He was about His Father’s business and lived to do His will. The same should be true for us.
When you live a life of kindness, brotherly love comes naturally. You care for the sister in your midst, whether she dropped a pacifier in front of your feet, or she’s grieving the loss of a loved one. No matter how busy you are in the moment, or how your day has shaped up so far, you take the time to give preference to others and help to meet their needs. You can extend yourself farther than you think you can, by the grace of God, through the strength of God.
#4: Forgive one another.
But love your enemies, do good, and lend, hoping for nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High. For He is kind to the unthankful and evil. Therefore be merciful, just as your Father also is merciful. -Luke 6:35-36 NKJV
Sister, we don’t deserve forgiveness from the Most High, yet He gives it to us through the blood of Christ. How can we not then extend that same forgiveness to others in our lives?
The Lord calls you to extend mercy– to follow the ultimate example of His kindness– His mercy, even to those who are unthankful and continue to live a life separated from His forgiveness. You’ll encounter some who care nothing of your forgiveness; they’ll still be spiteful and hateful toward you. Yet, it’s not your job to change their hearts. It is your job to love your enemies, do good, and lend, hoping for nothing in return. You do this out of obedience to Him, not because you’re hoping to receive love and mercy back from the other person.
Remember, kindness expects nothing in return.
Bible Verses about Kindness
There are so many Bible verses about kindness. Here are a few to get you started. I encourage you to do your own reading, and find the stories of saints throughout Scripture that speak volumes of a life lived in kindness.
Psalm 31:21 NKJV
Blessed be the LORD, for He has shown me His marvelous kindness in a strong city!
Psalm 119:76 NKJV
Let, I pray, Your merciful kindness be for my comfort, according to Your word to Your servant.
Proverbs 19:22 NKJV
What is desired in a man is kindness, and a poor man is better than a liar.
Galatians 5:22 NKJV
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.
Ephesians 2:7 NKJV
…that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.
Titus 3:1-8 NKJV
Remind them to be subject to rulers and authorities, to obey, to be ready for every good work, to speak evil of no one, to be peaceable, gentle, showing all humility to all men. For we ourselves were also once foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving various lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful and hating one another. But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, that having been justified by His grace we should become heirs according to the hope of eternal life. This is a faithful saying, and these things I want you to affirm constantly, that those who have believed in God should be careful to maintain good works.
Romans 2:4 NASB
Or do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and restraint and patience, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance?
Romans 11:22 CSB
Therefore, consider God’s kindness and severity: severity toward those who have fallen but God’s kindness toward you — if you remain in his kindness. Otherwise you too will be cut off.
read more of the Godly Woman Wardrobe
5 Biblical Ways to Show Compassion
Showing compassion to others isn’t a one-size-fits-all. It will look different for each of us in every situation we encounter. Read Part 1 of The Godly Woman Wardrobe: Tender Mercies.
As women, we think a lot about what to wear, do we not? Sometimes, too much. We have certain outfits for different occasions; and certain accessories to go with those outfits. Once in a while, we even open up our closets, look at hangers of clothing and deem, we have nothing to wear. But, the amount of clothing we have isn’t everything. There are so many in this world who only have a few suitable outfits but can be dressed to perfection each and every day. No matter if our closets are full or not, what we put on spiritually is so much more important than the fashion we don on the outside.
It’s all about who we are in Christ.
In Christ,
We are the elect of God.
We are holy.
We are beloved.
Therefore...we can put on these traits that reflect Christ and the work of the Holy Spirit within us.
Colossians 3:10 states that once we’re in Christ, we have “put on the new man who is renewed in knowledge according to the image of Him who created him.”
In Christ, we have a renewed knowledge, whereas we are able to see, with the right perspective, who we are in Him. We’ve been created in the image of God, and finally, in Christ, our lens allows us to see ourselves and Him more clearly. Knowing these things, we can then decide (daily, not just once) to put on the characteristics of our new man– the characteristics that line up with Godly character.
I call this the Godly Woman Wardrobe. If you haven’t read the quick summary of all 7 pieces of the wardrobe, start here: 7 Things Every Christian Woman Should Wear.
Now, are you ready for your first outfit, sister?
Let’s dive into Tender Mercies.
What is Compassion?
Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies… Colossians 3:12 NKJV
Tender mercies is a fancy way of saying compassion. The Hebrew and Greek words translated “compassion” in the Bible mean “to have mercy, to feel sympathy and to have pity.” Compassion is a necessary part of the Christian life. We weren’t meant to live on an island, only concerned with ourselves and our own affairs. We live in a broken world full of sin, and that sin brings pain, hurt, loss, and need. Whereas we can’t solve every problem in all of the world, the Lord doesn’t want us to be blind to what’s right in front of us either.
Compassion comes to life as we live out 1 Corinthians 13, fully embodying what Christ-like love looks like. We are kind; we show patience; we seek the welfare of others; we give others hope and endure with them.
When our eyes are open and we see others how the Lord sees them, we are able to slow down, step into their shoes, and seek Him for ways to help.
The Lord is our example. As the creator and master of compassion Himself– He is our guide. We only need to look to Him for ways to show compassion.
Examples of Compassion
We have so many examples of compassion in the Bible. How could we not? Our God is all-knowing, loving, patient, and powerful. He sees our needs and hears the cries of those who call to Him (Nehemiah 9:9-10).
“As a father pities his children, so the Lord pities those who fear Him. For He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust.”
Just as when your child is tired, you are more patient, you understand their unruly behavior a bit better, and you don’t expect too much of them— this is God's way with us. In His wisdom, although He knows the end from the beginning, He remembers our lowly state, that we are but dust, and has compassion on us in our times of suffering, lamenting, sorrow, weariness, and grief.
As we do with our own kids, He remembers that we too are but children— His children. In our frailty, weakness, and stumbles, He has mercy and compassion. It’s almost beyond our understanding and comprehension– the amount of compassion He has toward us.
This compassion comes to those who fear Him— the reverential fear of the Lord. It’s for those who love Him and call Him Father; for His daughters, those of us who are in Christ: holy, beloved, and the elect of God.
Jesus, being 100% both God and Man, in having the character of God, not only had the Father-like compassion described here, but as Son of Man, He was able to sympathize and empathize with our weaknesses. He experienced and expressed this compassion during His time here on earth.
Remember that time He looked over the great crowd that was following Him, and He desired to teach them many things because in His compassion He saw they were like a sheep without a shepherd (Mark 6:34)?
Or, what about the time He came ashore and met a great crowd, immediately had compassion on them, and began to heal their sick (Matthew 14:14)?
And, perhaps one of the most relatable times Jesus showed compassion– when He was at Lazarus’s gravesite. Although He knew what He was about to do, He wept. (John 11:33-35).
We aren’t all-powerful like God, but sister, we do have the power of the Holy Spirit in us. Following His lead, we too can show compassion to others in similar ways as we look upon their state, see their need, and allow God to use us to fill it.
Showing Compassion: 5 Biblical Ways
Showing compassion to others isn’t a one-size-fits-all. It will look different for each of us in every situation we encounter. But when we make the decision to live for the Lord on purpose we will seek ways to please Him, and one way to do that is to show care for those whom He created in ways He tells us to. Here are 5 biblical ways to show compassion:
#1: Comfort those who are going through what you’ve been through.
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. -2 Corinthians 1:3-4 ESV
Our God is the God of all comfort. His love extends to the deepest depths of our soul, our grief, and our struggles. Because we experience His comfort in our times of need, we then have the framework for how we can give the same type of comfort to others.
Navigating our own struggles gives us the understanding, sympathy, and empathy needed to help someone else go through the same situation in the future. We can reach out to them appropriately, say the right words, or do what is most helpful to them because we have “been there, done that.” One of the greatest forms of compassion felt by another is the realization that someone “gets them” or understands.
Use your trials as the testimonies and “work experience” needed to guide someone who’s currently on a similar journey.
showing compassion: a look at Romans 12 (free download)
Being intentional in our actions yields a life that brings glory to God— but only when our actions line up with His Word! Romans 12 has so much wisdom for us in how to treat others and how to show compassion on a daily basis. Download your FREE copy featuring 25 ways to encourage, build up and show compassion to others. Fill out the form below.
#2: Compassion is shown by doing.
But whoever has this world’s goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him? My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth. -1 John 3:17-18 NKJV
Oftentimes, much more good is done by doing, not by saying. We may not always have the right words, but we can have the right actions. When we see a need, we can step up and do something to help. It simply takes a watchful eye, a watchful heart, and the willingness to extend what we have (time, effort, money, possessions) to another person.
Let us not “shut up our hearts” from one another. Showing compassion is synonymous with showing God’s love.
#3: Don’t judge others for the situations they’re in.
Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. -Matthew 7:1-2 ESV
It’s easy to look at someone with a critical eye and judge their mistakes against your better judgment. We all are infallible humans who are tempted by a sinful world. We all have the free will to decide whether or not we will choose to walk by the Spirit in a moment. None of us choose perfectly 100% percent of the time.
Showing compassion means we step alongside a person and show them the love of God. We offer them the truth of the Word, encourage them to get back on track and help them see more clearly the path of wisdom if they’ve decided to deviate to foolishness.
Yes, we must stay on guard ourselves so we don’t fall into similar temptation, but at the same time, we offer grace, not judgment.
#4: Rejoice or weep with those who do likewise.
Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. -Romans 12:15 ESV
Live where they are. As sisters in Christ, the Lord implores us to be actively involved in each other’s lives. In the good times– be the person standing alongside your sister, cheering for her or with her. Rejoice in all things honorable and rejoiceable. And, in the hard circumstances and trials of life, hold up her arms, offer kind words, or be the shoulder on which she can cry. We need each other in all seasons of life. Be sure to show up. If nothing else, just show up.
#5: Keep your eyes open and follow the Lord’s lead.
When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. And he began to teach them many things. -Mark 6:34
During Jesus’s time here on earth, one thing we can’t deny was that He noticed people– all the time, in every situation. The God who sees, still sees us today; and He desires that we see people too. Be a person who notices– the person alone, the one who is hurting, the friendless, and helpless. The child; the widow; the sick. It takes being perceptive and patient to see the need; then it takes prayer to know what action to take. In all these things we need to have our eyes wide open– looking above to heavenly things enough to know what the Lord would have us do according to His will (Colossians 3:1-2).
Showing compassion is a beautiful expression of a life lived for the glory of God. As we pursue Christ and His righteousness, we become more and more like Him. His desires become our desires, and therefore we become His hands and feet.
We just need to be usable. Be willing. Be loving.
Bible verses about compassion
There are so many Bible verses about compassion. Here are a few to get you started as you daily choose to put on tender mercies.
Lamentations 3:21-23 NKJV
This I recall to my mind, therefore I have hope. Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.
Galatians 6:2 NKJV
Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.
1 Peter 3:8 NKJV
Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous;
Psalm 86:15 NKJV
But You, O Lord, are a God full of compassion, and gracious, longsuffering and abundant in mercy and truth.
2 Peter 3:9 NKJV
The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.
Matthew 14:14 NKJV
And when Jesus went out He saw a great multitude; and He was moved with compassion for them, and healed their sick.
Be sure to read the rest of the 7-part Godly Woman Wardrobe series!
4 Impeccable Accessories for Every Christian Woman
When we think about our Christian character, we think about who we are in Christ. We are a new creation in Him, and our old ways, characteristics, traits, thoughts, and mannerisms are…
I must admit— I’m not the fanciest or trendiest person. I like to keep up as best I can, but you likely won’t see me rocking the latest style jeans, dresses, sweaters, or fill-in-the-blank. Being an Instagram-worthy fashionista is just a little bit daunting to me.
But, even if my cute sweaters are a little too “last season”, throwing on the right accessories kind of distracts from that a bit, am I right? I can put on some eye-catching earrings, a belt, or fancy shoes and give an old outfit a new look.
Accessories can heighten and change the look of almost any outfit— in or out of style.
So it is with our Christian character. While the Lord calls us to put on some new things once we become a new creation in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17) and we are walking in His light— just like with our fashion— there needs to be a constant putting on of these things, daily. It’s not a one-time, “get it right forever” deal. It’s a regular yielding to the Spirit to help us live this way.
And, even with these “new things” that we put on, there are certain accessories that will heighten the way our new dress looks. These accessories upgrade our Christian character and conduct because being mindful to wear them means we are allowing God to control our newness of life, not ourselves.
Christian Character
When we think about our Christian character, we think about who we are in Christ. We are a new creation in Him, and our old ways, characteristics, traits, thoughts, and mannerisms are to be gone. When we allow the Lord to work in us and change us from the inside out, we become more and more like Him– walking in His ways, according to the will of God.
As we pursue the Lord and His righteousness, our Christian character becomes more crisp and resilient.
What are accessories?
If you haven’t read my post 7 Things Every Christian Woman Should Wear, take a few minutes to read about the main dress every Christian woman needs! These are the vital things we Christian women should be mindful to put on as we live out our new life in Christ. These traits are laid out for us by the Lord Himself in Colossians 3:12-14.
But, the accessories that go along with these 7 traits are very powerful parts of our Christian character that we should be mindful to put on— or rather, that we should allow to rule our inner beings.
As I state in my above-mentioned post, any well-put-together outfit strategically uses accessories to pull it all together. According to www.shopyourwardrobe.com, “Accessories provide interest to your outfit. Without them, you run the risk of getting bored with your wardrobe, and your outfits looking boring, because they’re always the same. Accessories extend the life of your clothes and familiar ensembles.”
The bottom line is, that we can try to pursue having a strong Christian character on our own and in our own strength, but these accessories are what hold it all up. That’s because they come from the Lord and are the workings of His might, not ours.
4 Accessories for Every Christian Woman
So sister, let’s heighten our dress with these important accessories.
#1: The Peace of God
True peace is only found through God— specifically through our acceptance of Christ’s redemptive work on the cross. As believers, we are called to the peace of God as believers. As a fruit of the Spirit, when the Holy Spirit dwells in us and we allow Him to lead us, we will fully experience His peace.
Having the peace of God means that we have comfort, security, and a calm that is present deep within our souls, no matter what our outside circumstances look like. We know that the Lord is our safety, He has us, and He will protect us.
It’s like Jesus sleeping on the boat in the middle of the storm. His disciples were in a state of panic. Jesus showed them the example of God’s peace.
His peace should rule (control) our hearts. This means that our thoughts, feelings, and emotions should NOT control us. Jeremiah 17:9 tells us that the heart is deceitful above all things— this is why His peace needs to be in control, not our hearts.
His peace exists amidst ALL circumstances, not just the good ones.
“And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
We won’t always understand all of our circumstances because His peace is greater than our trivial understanding. It surpasses it. And, as we let it rule our hearts, it guards our hearts and minds against all uncertainty, doubt, fear, and emotions that lead us astray. Let His peace stand at the gates where our enemies dare to enter.
RELATED: Discover more about the importance of the Peace of God.
#2: The Word of Christ
As a Christian woman, it’s likely you know the importance of the Word of God in your life. But, let’s stop and really think about a few things.
The Lord writes the Word on our hearts and minds (Hebrews 10:16); therefore we should not forsake it. It should dwell in us richly.
The word for “dwell” in the original Greek means to inhabit; or to dwell in and influence for good. This isn’t just talking about head knowledge— anyone can memorize the Scriptures or “know” what the Bible says. Sister, this is more than that.
It’s as if the Word of God is to take up residence in our lives, so much so that it permeates our being and influences every thought and action we take.
“But the word is very near you. It is in your mouth and in your heart, so that you can do it.”
The Lord gives us His Word so we have a standard, roadmap, and a manual by which to live. It is to dwell in us and be written on our hearts so we can live it out, not just know it.
The Word of God should become our internal operating system.
And, as Colossians 3:16 says, it won’t just dwell, but dwell richly. The Word of God can dwell in us richly because He gives it abundantly. What God gives us, He always gives us richly and abundantly (1 Timothy 6:17; Titus 3:6; 2 Peter 1:11).
The Word allows us to walk in wisdom (Psalm 119:98) — wisdom that comes from God– true wisdom. It guides us in all righteousness. But, we must know it, meditate on it, and live by it.
Ask yourself: What effect does the Word have in my life, actions, and conduct?
Bible Verses about the Word of God
These are just a few Bible verses about the Word of God. Comb the Scriptures yourself and discover many more! God desires that we know and understand the importance of the Word of God in our lives.
Hebrews 4:12; Psalm 119:98; Joshua 1:8; Luke 8:21; Luke 11:28: Ephesians 6:17; 1 Thessalonians 2:13; Revelation 19:13.
tools to help you dive deep into the word
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#3: Knowing the Importance of Worship
When the word dwells richly within our hearts, we have a greater understanding of who God is— His kindness, mercy, grace, goodness, and faithfulness. We feel and know the depth of His love for us. How could we not then have a worshipful heart? How could we not desire to sing praises to Him?
What is worship? Worship is to regard with great or extravagant respect, honor, or devotion. When we worship, we give God the honor and reverence He deserves. He and He alone is worthy to be praised.
Yet, sometimes our worship seems dry and forced. Ever feel that way, sister? We don’t have the umphf and pizazz we usually do. Well, I don’t believe this attitude within us has anything to do with the Lord. He doesn’t change. He is not less praiseworthy today than He was yesterday.
“He’s laid it all out for us— the expression of who He is written in the form of His Word, and physically seen through Jesus Himself. ”
No— I believe this lack of enthusiasm in our worship comes because we have not been spending ample time with the Lord in His Word. We have not been finding delight in His Word (Psalm 119:47), and therefore, our delight in Him is lacking. This is why making time for God is so crucial.
You can’t get to know someone you don’t spend time with. And, would you really speak praises to others about a person you don’t know? Of course not.
He’s laid it all out for us— the expression of who He is written in the form of His Word, and physically seen through Jesus Himself.
It’s our job to grab hold of the revelation He’s given us. The importance of worship shows itself in the end result: a heart that desires to teach and admonish one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord (Colossians 3:16).
RELATED: 22 Ways to Make Time for God
#4: A Consistent Christian Character
When we do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, we act consistently with Who He is and what He wants for our lives.
We yield to the Spirit in our everyday lives. No matter what decision we’re faced with, we take it to the Lord, allowing Him to guide our steps, direct our paths, and convict us on whether or not our actions line up with His Word.
“…for it is God who is at work in you, both to desire and to work for His good pleasure. Do all things without complaining or arguments; so that you will prove yourselves to be blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you appear as lights in the world…”
When we do all in the name of the Lord, we show the same compassion for others as He does. We do His will without complaining, no matter how insignificant the actions seem. We are more concerned with God receiving the glory through us (1 Corinthians 10:31), as opposed to our comfortability.
RELATED: How to Make Decisions as a Christian
The Beautiful Accessories of Our Christian Character
Sister, what will it be for you? Will you don the eye-catching, spirit-lifting accessories the Lord calls us to wear? Will you spend ample time with the Lord, gain a deeper knowledge of Him, praise and worship Him, allowing the Word of God to dwell within you richly?
It’s a choice. Just like you choose to add accessories to any outfit you wear, you choose to put on these additional pieces of your Christian character.
I exhort you, sister to do so. In the process, you will grow in your love of the Lord and sing His praises to others. Is He not worthy of that?
More in Christian Living
7 Things Every Christian Woman Should Wear
I love when the seasons change. There’s something exciting about the anticipation of a “newness” of sorts on the horizon– the change in weather, the amount of sunlight, and the difference…
I love when the seasons change. There’s something exciting about the anticipation of a “newness” of sorts on the horizon– the change in weather, the amount of sunlight, and the difference in the feeling of the ground underneath my feet. I enjoy the soft crunch of grass between my bare toes in the summer. And, even though winter is my least favorite season, I still appreciate a few changes that time of year brings.
With the change of weather comes the change of wardrobe. Switching out the clothes in my closet or drawers isn’t my favorite thing to do, but I do enjoy going from the heavyweight materials and toned-down colors of winter to the bright and airy fabrics of spring and summertime.
Change can be good. Especially when it’s God-ordained.
In Christ, we are changed. Upon accepting Him as our Savior, we become a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17). And, just like our seasonal wardrobes, there are things we need to take off and put on. Why?
Because the character of a Christian is important to God. We can’t truly live life purposely, to the glory of God if we are still walking in our old ways.
Seasons Change
Whether you’re a new Christian, or you’ve been a believer for years, the Lord calls you to walk in His ways. Typically, our ways are not His ways, right? Some things need to change in our lives so that we can live in a way that brings glory to Him.
Not putting off these old ways of ours is much like continuing to wear our winter coats in the summertime. It doesn’t take long to begin to feel weighed down, inappropriate, and completely out of sorts. Continuing in our old habits and old “dress” even though our season has changed holds us back.
What Not to Wear
But now you yourselves are to put off all these: anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy language out of your mouth. Do not lie to one another, since you have put off the old man with his deeds, and have put on the new man who is renewed in knowledge according to the image of Him who created him. (Colossians 3:8-11 NKJV)
Since we died with Christ and are raised in newness of life with Him, we are to put to death what is evil and earthly within us: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, covetousness, and idolatry (Colossians 3:5).
Put to death. Those are strong words! The behaviors God calls us to cast aside in our walk with Him are to be just that– cast aside and put to death through the power of the Holy Spirit within us (Romans 8:13) and never picked up again.
Along with the traits we’re to put to death, verses 8-11 call us to put off several other things:
#1: Put off ANGER:
While it may be ok for things to anger you, such as grieving over sin, acting out in our anger is never a good thing (Ephesians 4:26). Anger should never rule our thoughts, actions, or permeate our relationships.
#2: Put off WRATH:
Wrath and anger go hand in hand at times in the Bible (Genesis 49:7; Proverbs 15:1; Deuteronomy 29:28), because extreme anger leads to wrath. However, no matter the injustice, wrath is something that should be left unto God and God alone (Romans 12:19).
#3: Put off MALICE:
Merriam-Webster defines malice as a desire to cause pain, injury, or distress to another. What are our intentions in our relationships with others, especially when they’ve wronged us? In our flesh, our natural inclination can be to desire pain for others when we’re upset with them– especially via our words.
#4: Put off BLASPHEMY:
As a believer– a child of God for whom Christ died– insulting the Lord, or any acts of irreverence towards Him is wrong. We need to set a good example and be good witnesses in our words and conduct.
#5: Put off FILTHY LANGUAGE:
What we speak is important. Our words should be uplifting, edifying, and leave others with grace (Ephesians 4:29). What types of words are we using? One minute are we praising the Lord, and in the next breath, mumbling a swear word? If we have issues with foul language, filthy jokes, or unwholesome talk of any sort, we can pray and ask the Lord to help us control our tongues.
#6: Put off LIES:
The Lord is truth (John 14:6), therefore we cannot live in a way that is congruent to His character if we are deceptive and speaking lies. Pursuing a righteous life means that we want to exhibit His qualities, and lying is not something that the Lord ever does. Those who lie do not escape (Proverbs 19:5).
Keeping these terrible traits cast off (yes, it is a continual process of obedience!) is much easier to do when we keep our eyes focused on the Lord.
What to wear
What does the Bible say about Christian character? Colossians 3:10 states that once we’re in Christ, we have “put on the new man who is renewed in knowledge according to the image of Him who created him.”
If we are truly pursuing the Lord and His righteousness, then as we seek Him, we will be renewed in our knowledge of Him and all that He is, we’ll desire for the Holy Spirit to work in us and change us, and our character will become more like the image of Him who created us.
As we’ve seen, Colossians 3 begins by giving us a list of things we are to cast off once we become believers. Verse 12 starts with “therefore,” indicating that given what God has done through Christ, and since we are “the elect of God, holy and beloved” these are the attitudes and behaviors God expects in response from believers, in terms of our relationships with others.
So, sister– it’s a new season. What shall we wear?
Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection. (Colossians 3:12-14 NJKV)
#1: TENDER MERCIES:
We should have a heart of compassion, just as the Lord does with us. Read more about living with Biblical compassion.
#2: KINDNESS:
Kindness is goodness towards others that involves your whole being and mellows any harshness within you. So, it’s not just being kind to someone—it’s that your BEING is kind. Are you clothed in kindness? Find out here.
#3: HUMILITY:
This is the opposite of self-love. You don’t think less of yourself. You think of yourself, less. And when we are humble before the Lord, He will lift us up (James 4:10). Your Biblical guide to humility, right here.
#4: MEEKNESS/GENTLENESS:
This is when we have a willingness to suffer injury or insult rather than be the one to inflict those insults on others. In today’s world, a meek and gentle spirit is often mistaken for weakness. Yet, the Word tells us that the meek are blessed and will inherit the earth (Matthew 5:5; Psalm 37:11).
#5: LONGSUFFERING/PATIENCE:
Patience is the opposite of quick anger and revenge. You don’t hang onto resentment. You patiently endure as Christ did, and continues to do with us. We are called to be patient with others, patient with the Lord as we wait on Him, and let patience have its perfect work within us (James 1:4).
#6: BEAR ONE ANOTHER AND FORGIVE:
Christ forgave us, so what makes us think that we shouldn’t forgive our fellow brothers and sisters? Being unwilling to forgive or even bear with others in love is evidence of pride in our lives. Things won’t always be fun and copasetic in relationships– yet, we are called to work things out and bear with others in those difficult things. This is what mature believers do.
#7: LOVE:
He calls this the “bond of perfection,” or NASB says, “the perfect bond of unity.” All the other virtues listed above, are distorted if done without love.
It’s not about fashion– it’s faith. It’s not about outward appearance– it’s our inner being. The Lord is concerned with our character. So what’s next?
“Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved...”
Don’t forget your essential accessories
And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him. (Colossians 3:15-17)
Any well-put-together outfit strategically uses accessories to pull it all together. According to www.shopyourwardrobe.com, “Accessories provide interest to your outfit. Without them, you run the risk of getting bored with your wardrobe, and your outfits looking boring, because they’re always the same. Accessories extend the life of your clothes and familiar ensembles.”
But wait– I just said this isn’t about fashion, so what am I talking about?
Colossians 3:15-17 runs through several more, very powerful parts of our character that we should be mindful to put on— or rather, that we should allow to rule our inner beings.
These things are nothing short of gifts from the Lord, and when we purpose to not lose sight of them and intentionally make them a part of our faith walk, they heighten the intensity of the character of our new person.
Just as the right accessories heighten the look and appearance of the perfect outfit. Dare I say the accessories are the most important factor.
Without these much-needed godly accessories, our character falls flat and at best comes across as worldly and fleshly.
the accessories that make our wardrobe purposeful
He gives us the PEACE OF GOD, which is an attitude of true rest and security, only experienced by those in Christ. The Lord is peace, He offers us peace, and He wants His peace to rule in our hearts.
He desires that the WORD OF CHRIST would dwell in us richly. God’s Word should live in us, permeate our being, and control every thought, word, and deed– in all wisdom.
This produces an UPLIFTING and WORSHIPFUL HEART that encourages others, worships with others, and sings praises to the Lord.
And, when His peace rules our hearts and His Word dwells richly within us, we’ll be prompted to DO ALL IN THE NAME OF THE LORD JESUS. We’ll act consistently with Who He is and what He wants, with a thankful heart.
How can we have the character of a Christian?
I know, I know– living in a way that pleases God and exhibiting all of these character traits is easier said than done. It’s impossible to live this way in every moment, day-to-day, in our own strength. We need the Holy Spirit working within us, guiding us and leading us in our decision-making and conduct.
And, the Lord provides help. I think there is an important hint for us at the beginning of Colossians 3. If we are constantly looking around the world for our example of how to live with integrity and how to have a godly character, we won’t find it.
Instead, we are to seek and set our mind on things above, not on things of the earth (Colossians 3:1-2).
When we keep our eyes on Jesus, we see the example of One who perfectly walked out all of these attributes we are to put on.
Are you ready for the change?
So, sister– join me this season, will you? This season calls for our best dress. Our best submission to His will for our lives. Our best desire to abide in Him. Our best heart of praise for Him. Our winter coats have no place in the summer with the Son. Toss out the old rags. Let’s put on only what He desires of us.
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Waiting is seldom easy. In fact, it can be downright difficult. But, it’s always possible. I know it doesn’t feel that way at the moment, but let’s take our feelings…