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How to Spend Time with God as a Busy Mom
+Free Bible Study Printables+ Making time for God as a busy mom isn’t always the easiest thing to do. But, studying God’s Word is one of the most important things we can do to cultivate a deeper relationship with the Lord. Learn the key to spending more time with God, as well as 22 TIPS to help you consistently get in the Word each day.
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I barely remember what my daily routine was like before having kids. I don’t remember what time of day I studied the Word. I know I did in fact study the Word (I have many journal entries to prove it), so my limited recollection leads me to believe that I didn’t have trouble spending time with God.
Our first child was born in 2013. I had many sleepless nights as I struggled with normal newborn challenges, adjusting to life as a new mom, and breastfeeding/pumping issues. I’m also fairly certain I had postpartum depression but was never officially diagnosed. Needless to say, I barely had time to shower, let alone spend ample time reading the Word.
Our second child came 19 months later. With two kids under two, along with working full-time, life was a whirlwind. I remember often wondering, how do you spend time with God when you’re busy?
RELATED: Finding Rest in the Midst of Motherhood
My kids have always been early birds, so that, coupled with getting ready for work, didn’t leave much time for uninterrupted studying in the mornings (my preferred time of day).
I don’t remember getting into a solid quiet time routine until our first two children were a bit older.
After becoming a stay-at-home mom in 2018, my mornings became a little easier to manage. I was able to set aside a solid 45 minutes to an hour before the kids woke up to read the Bible and pray.
Fast forward to 2020– I was several months pregnant with our third child, and between general tiredness, morning sickness, and a few minor pregnancy complications, I fell out of my morning routine– until that baby was almost one-year-old. *Sigh*
Now, that’s not to say I wasn’t reading the Bible during those times, because I was. I just wasn’t diligently meeting with the Lord each day and really seeking Him with all my heart.
Why do I tell you this? For one, maybe you can relate.
But, mainly my point is there’s an ebb and flow to our spending time with God. It’s not always going to go perfectly, and it won’t always be easy.
And, while there are numerous ways to grow spiritually as a mom, studying God’s Word should be at the top of our list.
So, let’s take a look at why it’s so important.
What is God’s Word?
God’s Word is God-breathed, divinely inspired, alive, and– it’s Jesus. Asking, ‘What is God’s Word?’ seems like a silly question. But, sometimes we get so used to having access to the Word of God that we don’t stop and truly think about what it is. Let’s briefly explore each of these truths.
God’s Word is God-breathed
There isn’t a single piece of Scripture that is there by mistake. God ordained it to be, and it is all divinely breathed out by Him (2 Timothy 3:16-17). Everything we need pertaining to life and godliness is found in the Word, and it’s beneficial for our training and for equipping us.
God’s Word is Divinely Inspired
Even though God chose approximately 40 different men to pen the words of the text, and you can clearly see different writing styles throughout the Bible, the words were not their own. These men were inspired by God to write the words He wanted to communicate for generations to come.
“But know this first of all, that no prophecy of Scripture becomes a matter of someone’s own interpretation, for no prophecy was ever made by an act of human will, but men moved by the Holy Spirit spoke from God.”
God’s Word is alive
Our God is a living God; therefore, His Word is alive (Hebrews 4:12). God’s Word doesn’t change. It changed lives in the past, just as it does now– because it’s alive. It doesn’t need to be edited, added to, or subtracted from in order to keep up with the times. And, it powerfully works within us to accomplish what the Lord has for us.
Jesus is the Word
Jesus is literally the Word (John 1:14). He is the epitome of every truth of Scripture, wrapped up in the perfect example of love and the Savior of the world. Studying the Word is studying Jesus.
“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.”
“He is clothed with a robe dipped in blood, and His name is called The Word of God.”
Why is spending time with God Important?
When you make time for God, study His Word, and seek Him with all your heart, you will be blessed. Blessed, not only because you’re learning His Word, but also because you’re spending time with him.
“Blessed are those whose way is blameless,
Who walk in the Law of the Lord.
Blessed are those who comply with His testimonies,
And seek Him with all their heart.
They also do no injustice;
They walk in His ways.
You have ordained Your precepts,
That we are to keep them diligently. ”
spending time with God cultivates your relationship
How well do you know your husband? Your child? A close family close? I’m guessing, pretty well. Why? Because you spend time with them. You have conversations with them. You share your life with them. You can’t expect to have a close relationship with the Lord if you only pop in for a visit a few times a month.
spending time with God is personal
You need to study the Word for yourself. Don’t solely rely on sermons and pastors, no matter how good they are at accurately sharing God’s truths, to teach you everything about the Lord. The Bible is for everyone. It doesn’t have to be read to you or interpreted for you by man.
Like the Bereans, who “received the word with all readiness, and searched the Scriptures daily to find out whether these things were so,” (Acts 17:11), you too can read the Scriptures for yourself. Don’t worry about whether or not it will make sense to you– the Holy Spirit will help you understand what you need to know at the time.
it takes a decision
It starts with a decision. You have to decide to prioritize time for God. Making time for God won’t happen by accident or by default.
Let’s pause and talk about the fact that you can’t “make” more time. I know we throw that phrase around a lot– that we need to make more time for things– but, the reality is, we all have the same 24 hours in a day. We can’t create more time for ourselves.
The Bible tells us to redeem the time (Ephesians 5:16). The amount of time the Lord has given you is enough for what He has called you to do. And, one of those things you’re called to do is seek Him and learn His ways.
So, the decision needs to be to make good use of your time by purposely and intentionally prioritizing your schedule to spend time with God.
Below, I’m sharing 22 things that I have personally done over the years to ensure that I am making the Lord a priority in my schedule. Read through and find what works for you!
how to spend Time with God (22 tips!)
Making time for God by prioritizing your schedule is easier said than done. I know from experience. Here are a few tips to help you get started:
GET PREPARED
#1: PRAY and ask the Lord to help you be consistent in your schedule.
#2: PICK A SPECIAL SPOT in your house to study the Word, whether it’s a favorite chair or a quiet room. Eventually, this place will mentally become synonymous with your quiet time.
#3: FIND A TIME OF DAY that works for you. There is something powerful about starting the day off in the presence of the Lord, but if you’re not a morning person, don’t try to become one overnight. After a short time, you’ll dread getting up extra early, and you’ll start compromising on your study time. Whether it’s morning, lunchtime, or before bed, just pick a time and stick to it.
Morning Tips: Plan to get up 30-45 minutes before your children wake up. Grab a cup of coffee or tea, but then settle in and get started right away! Avoid the temptation to check your phone until you’re done. Make sure your special spot isn’t in an area of your house where you’ll be tempted to start cleaning or doing household chores.
Afternoon Tips: If this is your work lunch break, eating and studying at the same time can work! Just stay focused. Politely ask your co-workers to not disturb you (and who knows how they’ll be impacted by seeing you read the Bible daily!). If you’re home, remember to turn off the TV, and worry about cleaning up the lunch mess later!
Evening Tips: Wait until the kiddos are off to bed and the house is a little quieter. Make sure the TV is off, and it’s not so late that you’ll be falling asleep! If this is a time you regularly spend catching up with your spouse, be sure to talk to him before making a change to your “married couple” time. Find something that works for both of you.
#4: PUT YOUR STUDY TIME on your phone calendar or in your daily planner. Set it up as a recurring calendar entry.
#5: SET A RECURRING ALARM on your phone. This isn’t the same thing as putting it on your calendar! Setting an alarm so you can hear your phone ding serves as an audible reminder that it’s GO time.
#6: PLACE YOUR BIBLE and study tools in your special spot the night before (or earlier in the day if you study at night).
#7: GET A SPECIAL NOTEBOOK AND PEN. Ok– you’re probably not an office supply nerd like I am, but I love a fresh notebook and brand-new pens! Sometimes having new writing tools helps get you excited about taking notes. They don’t have to be newly bought— find items you already have at home.
READY, SET…STUDY TIME
#8: PRAY BEFORE YOU READ. Ask the Lord to help you learn from Him and to minimize your distractions.
#9: GIVE YOUR CHILDREN A VISUAL CUE (if they’re awake) to let them know it’s your study time and to not disturb you. Put a sign on the door, set a timer so they know when you’ll be done, or simply tell them beforehand, “When mom sits in this chair, I’m spending time with God. When I get up, that means I’m ready to play again.”
#10: HAVE A DAILY PLAN. Follow a Bible study plan or purpose to read through an entire book, unless the Holy Spirit lays something different on your heart that day.
#11: CHOOSE WISELY. Devotionals and Christian books are great tools to help you continue to grow spiritually, but I believe these should be picked up AFTER you’ve spent time in God’s Word. The words of men do not compare to the Word of God. These tools are extra.
#12: WRITE SCRIPTURE AS YOU READ, or write a summary at the end of each chapter. This will help you stay focused and motivated to come to the Word each day to continue your notes.
#13: TRY A NEW BIBLE STUDY METHOD: Inductive Bible study, Bible Journaling, the SOAP Method, studying line-by-line, writing Scriptures– and more! Find one that works for you.
#14: SET REALISTIC GOALS. Whether it’s one verse or an entire chapter, the goal is to simply study the Word! Study what you can truly absorb in the time you have.
#15: DON’T GET DISCOURAGED. My study time is interrupted by a waking child more often than not. Know what interruptions may come, and honestly, expect them. Focus hard in the time you have.
Free Bible Study Printables
Are you looking for free Bible Study Printables to help you study the Word? Now that you’ve got plenty of tips to help you get started in setting up a consistent quiet time, print these out and create a new Bible Study binder! Fill out the form below.
PRO TIPS
#16: DOWNLOAD A BIBLE APP like Blue Letter Bible, Bible Gateway, or YouVersion so you have the Word on the go. These apps have many different study tools, including concordances, commentaries, and daily reading plans.
#17: MAKE USE OF DOWNTIME. Pull up the Bible app while you’re in the checkout line or waiting for something to heat up in the microwave.
#18: FORSAKE WASTEFUL THINGS. Examine your life and find the timewasters. Maybe this is social media or tv time. These things aren’t always wasteful of course, but if you’re choosing to do these before– or instead of– reading the Word, you aren’t redeeming your time well.
#19: READ THE WORD WHILE YOU EAT. You’d be amazed at how spending just 15 minutes a day in the Word can impact you.
#20: LISTEN TO THE WORD while you drive or do household tasks like dishes, cooking, or folding laundry. Many of the Bible apps mentioned above have audible features.
#21: FIND ACCOUNTABILITY. Link arms with another sister and encourage each other. Maybe she texts to see how it’s going, or you chat regularly to share what each of you is learning.
#22: GIVE YOURSELF GRACE. Don't beat yourself up if you miss a day! Build up consistency and it’ll eventually become a habit you can’t live without!
The bottom line, sister, is that we can and we should study the Word daily! It may take a little schedule rearranging, but it’s possible. Pray, find what works for you, get in the groove, and grow in the Lord!
Do you have any additional tips or a favorite Bible study method? Share with me in the comments below!
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A Stay-At-Home Mom Schedule That Glorifies God
We have two choices— we can be controlled by our to-do list and stay-at-home mom schedule, or we can choose to yield to the Holy Spirit’s promptings as we…
Write it down. Accomplish it. Check it off. Move on to the next. Done. Done. And done.
Does your day ever feel like this, sister? An ongoing merry go ‘round of chores, activities, responsibilities, and tasks? A to-do list that gets (mostly) completed today, only so you can make a new one, and “take it again from the top!”, tomorrow?
And the schedule. Don’t get me started on the schedule! I am an organized girl by nature. I lay out plans, make schedules, watch the clock, and know what time all the things need to get done. It allows me to run a tight ship and keeps me efficient in the execution of my tasks.
It also holds me prisoner at times—- in a position where I’m bowed down to the likes of my schedule, instead of bowed to the will to the Lord.
Being a stay-at-home mom, it’s easy to get into the routine of rearranging our days however we see fit, whether that means making an elaborate stay-at-home mom schedule, or just going with the flow— saying yes to the things we want to do, and saying no to those we don’t.
But, if the Lord is to be the one directing our steps (Proverbs 16:9), do we need a stay-at-home mom schedule? How can we be mindful of our to-do list and the Lord’s promptings?
SAYING YES TO THE LORD
We know from various places in Scripture that all wisdom comes from the Lord. Proverbs 1:7 says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.” In our reverence of Him, we yield to His omniscience, understanding that our ways aren’t His ways, and our thoughts aren’t His thoughts (Isaiah 55:8). If this is in fact true, then we can rest assured that our days can be entrusted to His care and oversight.
Whether our quiet time is in the morning or at some other point during the day, there is beauty in beginning the day with surrendered hands, saying, “Alright, Lord, what do you have for me today?” But, hear this— not only asking Him, but also being ready to listen, receive, and obey.
Will we still have a to-do list ready to go? Probably. Will we still have some solid things on our schedule, like school for the kids, cooking meals, and appointments? Of course. But, in seeking the Lord first and foremost, we’re more likely to allow Him to lead the way as we go about our day, and more likely to heed His promptings as He leads us in the direction of other opportunities that may arise.
Give the Lord a verbal “good morning,” daily. Then, listen for His reply.
SAYING NO TO WHAT’S NOT HIS PLAN
Saying no can be tough. We have thoughts. Plans. People to see and things to do. We’re asked to join this committee, that ministry, go on a field trip, make cookies for the bake sale…
And we can do all of those things. We can find the time, rearrange our schedules, and add it to our to-do lists— all in the name of serving and being helpful. We were asked by someone, and we responded. Simple as that, right?
Yet, what did the Lord have to say about it? Did we even inquire of Him?
What would you say if I told you that God cares whether or not you bake those cookies? I truly believe He does. You see, if He is telling you to do something different with your time, but you ignore those promptings and instead make the cookies, then you’re being disobedient. He desires obedience over your serving in a particular way that is your will.
You can do a million great things for others today, sister. But if what you’ve done isn’t what the Lord intended for you to do, then you haven’t redeemed your time well. In your mind, it may not make sense as to why He would tell you to not join a particular ministry at church, but He’s got plans for you, and that ministry may just get in the way of His future purposes for you.
This is why we truly need to approach each decision with prayer and discernment so we can be mindful of the will of God.
Saying no is always a magnificent thing if it means we’re saying yes to the Lord instead.
A STAY-AT-HOME MOM SCHEDULE
I have sometimes likened being a stay-at-home mom to running a business. You are your own boss, you create your schedule, and determine the tasks that need to be executed.
While this can be true to an extent, what I now see a little more clearly is that this mindset sets us up to be the master of our own ship, tightly wound around our own will for the day. Doing so leaves us less flexible to walk, parent, and manage our homes in the Spirit. However, I do think there is value in having a plan for the flow of our days so that we don’t become idle or waste our time— neither of which is honoring to the Lord.
RELATED: THE IMPORTANCE OF SPIRIT-LED PARENTING
So what gives? Schedule or no schedule? To-do list or no list? Generally speaking, I believe we can lay out our plans and tasks, AND give attention and thought to the Lord. BUT– attention and thought to the Lord needs to come FIRST.
Here’s a very general example of a stay-at-home mom schedule. This is mainly meant to show you how and when you could incorporate some important points of meeting with the Lord throughout the day. Adjust it with your personal routines, meetings, and activities, as needed!
GENERAL STAY-at-home mom schedule
Morning Tasks
Wake: Sit quietly for a few minutes before the Lord.
Pray: Be thankful and seek His face.
Quiet Time: Start your day by meditating on His Word.
{Insert your morning routine here}: Coffee, breakfast, shower, get the kids ready, errands, etc!
Ask the Lord: What is your desire for me today?
{Be prepared to adjust your plans according to His will.}
Afternoon Tasks
Lunch: If your kids are home, sit down and enjoy lunch with them!
Nap/Quiet Time: For you, and the kids! This is a great time to be still before the Lord.
Pray/Clean-up: Tidy the kitchen and dining room, wash dishes, and minor clean up of common rooms. Pray while doing these tasks, seeking the Lord in the reflection of your day so far (How is my day going? How has my attitude been? Is there anything I should change for the rest of my day?)
Ask the Lord: What do you have for me next, today?
{Be prepared to adjust your plans according to His will.}
Evening Tasks
Dinner Prep: Use this time to listen to a sermon, the audio Bible, or an uplifting podcast while you cook.
Dinner: Sit down with your family. So many blessings come from time around the dinner table.
Pray/Reflect Together: Use dinner time to reflect on how each of you has seen God work in your lives throughout the day.
Family Devo: Spend time in the Word together. Pray together.
Bedtime for Kids: Pray over each one!
Spouse Time: Spend time with your spouse after the kiddos are asleep!
Ask the Lord: In what ways were You glorified through my actions today? Ask Him to convict your heart of any areas in which you need to change.
{Be prepared to listen in humility and humbly bow to His will tomorrow!}
As I said, this is a very general outline for a stay-at-home mom schedule! You will need to fill in the blanks with your life-specific tasks and responsibilities, but I pray you can see how easy it is to incorporate time before the Lord throughout your entire day. If you’re diligent and mindful to have constant communication with Him, your day can be tremendously blessed (and re-routed at times!) as you submit to Him.
focus on what matters most \\ nix what doesn’t!
Having a stay-at-home mom schedule that glorifies the Lord means that your schedule makes room for Him. It’s impossible to do so if you’re wasting time on frivolous activities that pull your attention away from the Lord’s plans for you. Download the Time Wasters Log & Prayer set, and start redeeming your time well! Fill out the form below.
YIELDING OUR STAY-AT-HOME MOM SCHEDULE TO THE LORD
Relinquishing our control over our perfectly planned days becomes simpler when our eyes are focused on the Lord and His purposes. Our stay-at-home mom schedule doesn’t have to be rigid. Most certainly, it shouldn’t rule us.
Psalm 90 gives us a few things to remember when we’re tempted to let it do so:
#1: WE CAN (and should) REDEEM OUR TIME WELL.
“So teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.”
The world can pull us this way and that, distracting us with every shiny opportunity available. We’re told to live it up and live life to the fullest. Yet, the Word tells us that we should number our days. There's an implication in this Psalm written by Moses that reminds us that life is frail– but a breath– and it should not be wasted on frivolous things. We’re to live with eternity in mind, which means our focus is on storing up treasure in heaven, not on earth.
The Lord will give us wisdom on how to keep the main thing the main thing.
Pointless striving, pursuits, and activities that yield no fruit in the Lord’s will for our lives must be disregarded if we are to walk out the good works that the Lord has prepared beforehand for us (Ephesians 2:10). This doesn’t mean that there’s no time for fun, entertainment, or relaxation. We just need to be aware of whether or not the things we’re choosing to do at a particular moment or on a particular day are distracting us from the Lord’s work in our lives.
It’s not easy to get in the habit of saying no to seemingly good and helpful things; however, the more we seek the Lord for His wisdom, the more clarity and peace we’ll have.
Our stay-at-home-mom schedule should be one that allows us to redeem our time well.
Grab a pen and paper, and sit down. Spend time before the Lord asking Him what you can add to or remove from your day in order to bring Him the most glory.
#2: WE CAN SEEK HIM (NOT OUR TO-DO LIST) FOR OUR CONTENTMENT.
“Oh, satisfy us early with Your mercy, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days!”
It’s tempting to allow the completion of our to-do list or stay-at-home mom schedule to bring us contentment. Accomplishment brings us an air of satisfaction, prompting us to give ourselves the proverbial pat on the back. We have the mindset ingrained in us to, “Go. Achieve. Do more. Strive. Get it done! Do more tomorrow!”
While there is nothing wrong with setting goals, working hard, not quitting, and seeing a task to completion, as Christian women, our eyes, minds, and hearts must be focused on the Lord in these things. Striving for the sake of striving, or for money, fame, power, or clout is not our lane. We’re meant to walk step in step with the Lord so we can know when He is telling us to, “Go. Do more”; or sometimes, “Stop.”
There will always be something to get done— whether that “something” is a big goal, washing the next round of dishes, or doing the 5th load of laundry that day. And as good as it may feel to cut the lights on a cleaned-up kitchen at the end of the night, our satisfaction cannot be found there. Our satisfaction must be in the Lord— in His mercy, His love, His will for our lives— just downright in Him.
Make room in your stay-at-home mom schedule to actively seek Him (through prayer, the reading of His Word, or worship, to name a few) for the contentment only He can bring.
#3: WE CAN ALLOW THE LORD TO ESTABLISH AND DIRECT OUR WORK.
“And let the beauty of the LORD our God be upon us, and establish the work of our hands for us; yes, establish the work of our hands.”
Earlier I mentioned that saying no to what’s not in the Lord’s will for us allows for the space to say yes to His plans. Although saying no may seem to be an impossible task at times, we can pray for the beauty and the favor of the Lord to be upon us, as Moses did in Psalm 90:17. What could possibly yield more contentment, peace, and perspective over our lives than the beauty of the Lord?
We have to let Him in, sister. Allow Him to fill in the pages of our planners and calendars. Release our control over our blocked-out time commitments each day. Again, we can make the plans, but we must have a heart ready to humbly bow and yield to His directions if our plans don’t match His. Focusing on His perfection and beauty prepares our hearts for that willingness.
He, in fact, wants to establish the work of our hands. And He will, if we’re willing to open the fists so tightly gripping our desire to complete our to-do list and live out our perfectly-timed schedule. Dare I say, we risk the chance of missing out on the good works He has prepared for us when we’re too committed to completing our own “good” works.
RELATED: 7 TRUTHS ABOUT GOOD WORKS
The interruption from the impromptu phone call from a hurting sister; the need to take extra time to speak life into your child; the little things that “put us behind”— could it be that we’re to walk out a good work from the Lord in those moments? Instead of immediately writing off the unplanned event as a distraction, we can pray a quick prayer when these things arise, asking the Lord if this is something He has for us to engage in right now, and the wisdom to do so.
Daily come before the Lord, seeking His direction in your schedule, from one task to the next.
LED BY THE SPIRIT, OR OUR TO-DO LIST?
Sister, we don’t want to miss something that’s important to the Lord. Remember, He’s the one on the throne. Following the Lord means that we’ve turned from our desire to be the lord of our own lives, and instead, we allow Him to be on the throne of our hearts as the Lord of our lives.
The beauty of it all is that He wants to walk through this life with us. He wants to see us walk out our good works and lead us in how to do so. He wants us to use our brains and our uniqueness in our day-to-day tasks, not be His robotic puppets. However, in all of this, He desires for us to choose wisely, and choose Him.
Realize this: by NOT saying no to the things that aren’t in His will for us, and choosing to remain so tightly woven to our to-do list and stay-at-home schedule– these decisions put us in a place where we become robotic puppets, enslaved to our own devices.
So, are you led by the Spirit or by your to-do list, sister? Is your to-do list so pressing that it leaves no room for the Spirit’s promptings to direct you throughout the day? I encourage you to evaluate your heart, actions, and thoughts. Better than that, ask the Lord to search your heart and reveal His truth to you.
We can make room in our day for the Spirit’s promptings, leadings, and new directions; the unexpected. It just takes a decision; a bowed heart; eyes that long to focus on things above. It takes a love for Him that supersedes a sense of accomplishment; and wisdom that reminds us of the frailty of life and the need to redeem the time well.
At times we can feel as though our to-do lists are everlasting, but the fact is, only He is.
“Before the mountains were brought forth, or ever You had formed the earth and the world,
Even from everlasting to everlasting, You are God.”
There is nothing as pressing or important as the One who always was and always will be.
Remember that.
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To the Mom Who is Weary
Dear Mama,
I know you are tired. There are many noses to wipe, floors to clean, and meals to be had. I know, at the end of the day, you go to bed exhausted. And, perhaps even before the sun, you rise exhausted. But, Jesus has a few instructions for us weary moms.
Dear Tired Mom,
Can we talk about why we are weary? I’ll go first:
Most days, I have a Martha complex. You know, Martha– sister of Mary and Lazarus, three of Jesus’s friends who we meet in the pages of Scripture. There are things to be done around the house and someone needs to do them, no matter the cost; no matter what may be more important. At least, that’s what I tell myself. As a stay-at-home mom of three children, my days are filled with laundry, wiping down the bathroom for the umpteenth time, sweeping, and picking up hot dogs and mac n’ cheese off of the floor. There is always something.to.do. Always.
I’m not just talking to those of you who are fellow stay-at-home moms. The first five years of motherhood, I worked full-time. Working outside of the house and then coming home to do all the things around the house didn’t exactly leave more time to get things done! You know what I’m talking about.
At the end of the day, my head hits the pillow hard. I’m a tired mom. I should be exhausted enough to just drift off to sleep in extreme haste. Yet, more often than not, I lay in the dark replaying the day in my head– every mistake, every opportunity missed with my kids, and everything I could have done differently.
You’d think that after checking off all the tasks on my to-do list, I’d feel accomplished. Instead, most nights, I argue with myself about whether or not I’ve failed my kids in some type of way.
Maybe if I’d just spent less time washing the dishes and more time playing with my kids…maybe if I didn’t care so much about the messes made…if I had only spent more time reading to them instead of picking up around the house…if only…if only…
Even though I know that 75% of the things I think aren’t even true or don’t hold a heavy weight of severity in terms of “what matters in the grand scheme of things,” my thoughts still leave me weary and downtrodden, asking the Lord to help me have a better day tomorrow.
Fellow mama– am I all alone here, or can you relate?
The Lord doesn’t want us to live this way. The best that He has for us looks nothing like my regular nights. He doesn’t want us to live out our days in regret, focusing on all the wrong things. Just as He did with Martha, He desires us to sit at His feet and choose the better things.
So, weary mama, TIRED MOM– this one’s for you (and me!).
WHEN YOU’RE A TIRED MOM
Dear Tired Mom,
Yes, I know you are tired. There are many noses to wipe, floors to clean, and meals to be had. I know, at the end of the day, you go to bed exhausted. And, perhaps even before the sun, you rise exhausted.
“Come to Me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is comfortable, and My burden is light.
”
Those “who are weary,” as Jesus says, are those who work to exhaustion or labor. The word “labor” means to take burdens upon yourself. Are you like me, mama? When I'm weary, my default mode is to get overwhelmed and frustrated, which is a burden I take upon myself.
But, please remember-- mothering, in and of itself, isn't a burden.
Yes, at times, it can soak up every ounce of energy you have, make you want to pull out your hair, and turn to gray what hair you do have left; but, it's not a burden. It is one of the greatest gifts and privileges bestowed upon you by your Lord. The burden of true weariness lies in your frustration.
Instead of becoming frustrated, purpose to change your default behavior to one that comes before Him.
yoke of Jesus vs. your yoke
Dear Tired Mom,
Would you really put on a winter coat to go outside on a 95-degree day? Please understand, this is what you are doing when you take your yoke upon yourself. Your yoke includes those frustrations, burdens, and weariness-- the very things that are heavy, weigh you down, and exhaust you.
But, Jesus instructs you to take His yoke-- the one that is easy and light. The one that doesn't contain the burdens you've placed upon yourself. Take off your yoke and put on His.
A TIRED MOM NEEDS A LOWLY Jesus
Dear Tired Mom,
I know you would agree with me that Jesus is a servant, and as His child, you are called to be like Him. Yes, you should remember that it’s a privilege to serve your family and have this servant’s heart. Yet, despite those facts, you are still not qualified to carry out those tasks on your own. Jesus regularly took things to the Father in prayer (he was literally praying right before He spoke these words!).
Striving to be more like Him, you too need to regularly take the pieces of your life before the Father. You see, it takes humility to release to someone else those things you think you can do on your own. However, it needs to be done. You do not have the strength or ability to be gentle in the midst of carrying your burdens. There’s a reason Jesus calls all who are weary in this passage. He knows we’ll encounter this in our lives. Give your burdens to the Lord. Then, and only then, will you have the strength to truly serve your family with a gentle and lowly attitude.
rest for your soul will come
Dear Tired Mom,
Rest. Can I get an amen?! That four-letter, beautiful word. Yes, this is a promise. Only when you release your burdens and put on His yoke, do you find rest. The more you toil, tarry, and flutter, the less rest you find.
What I’m about to say may sound like Captain Obvious, but you don’t find rest by doing, being, or accomplishing more. I know at times I tend to forget that. Please don't join me in that mistake. If you cannot find rest for your soul, that’s an indication that something is wrong. You’re doing too much on your own.
Yet, this isn't just physical rest-- this is spiritual rest. True peace only comes when you make Jesus Lord of your life. And, when He’s Lord of your life, you willingly hand everything over to Him, let Him direct your steps, and take every thought captive to Him.
It doesn't mean that your days will suddenly become easy and your struggles will go away. I promise you, there still will be food stuck to the walls, water on the floor because your daughter’s doll wanted to “go to the pool” (true story), and potty-training mishaps. Even so, you'll have His peace because His yoke is comfortable, easy, and light.
Why? Because He bears the weight and you are at His feet, in strong fellowship with Him.
So, take heart, Tired Mom; Weary Mama.
combat the weariness with all you need
Jesus truly is all we need. He is our rest, our comfort, our peace, and our guidance. He’s done so much for us already, but in our busy motherhood, we often don’t take the time to look back and remember. This FREE, 5-Day Devotional Study calls you to reflect on the past while simultaneously being aware of His provision in your life, right now. Fill out the form below.
a decision for the tired mom
Can I give you a bit more encouragement? Now that we’ve lamented a bit and worn our hearts on our sleeve, let’s get practical. We know how to get the rest for our souls that Jesus desires for us, but we have a choice to make. It’s the same choice the Israelites were once faced with.
Prior to the impending event of the Israelites being captured and taken to Babylon, the Prophet Jeremiah spoke these words:
“This is what the Lord says:
“Stand by the ways and see and ask for the ancient paths,
Where the good way is, and walk in it;
Then you will find a resting place for your souls.”
But they said, ‘We will not walk in it.’ ”
It was true for the Israelites of that time, yet, there is a lot of wisdom in it for us today. Ironically, the wisdom is this-- while there is in fact wisdom available and offered to us by God, we have the opportunity to either accept or reject it.
So, allow me to bring this encouragement to you:
dear tired mom: Stand by the way and see
First, the Lord invites you to stand in His ways. When you stand, you stop moving and stop fluttering. Then He calls you to see– take the time to look and ask. Ponder His Word. Remember and meditate on His ways, and the things He has done for you in the past. Remember what He’s brought you through– those sleepless nights when your now 8-year-old was an infant and would wake hour after hour. Those times when your child disobeyed you directly, to your face. The time when this same child flushed a toy down the toilet for the 3rd time in six weeks (another true story).
Remember the times that were tough on your patience and your resolve, that the Lord brought you through. Reflect on the “good ways” of the Lord and have a heart to want to walk in those ways now.
dear tired Mom: walk in his ways
Then, He tells you to “Walk in it.” As the verse states in its entirety– first, you need to stand, regroup, re-center, and get back on the right path. Then, and only then, should you start walking. Otherwise, it’s likely that you’ll be walking on the wrong path, in disobedience to Him. Walk His path– obeying Him and following the ways in which He instructs you.
dear tired mom: obedience = rest
You see, that rest for your soul comes when you’re obedient. It comes when you’ve cast your cares, burdens, and worries on Him, and when you’re walking His path. Not only His path for your life as a whole but also His path for you at that moment. Only then will you find rest. And yes, just as in Matthew 11:29, this is a promise.
dear tired mom": it’s your choice…
The Israelites chose not to follow and obey God. They rejected the right path. Jeremiah 6:16 ends with, “But they said, ‘We will not walk in it.’”
Do you know that you’re capable of making this same choice? I know I’m guilty of it in the heat of the moment– when things are hard, no one is listening, and the kids are bickering. During those moments when I choose to become frustrated as opposed to taking my thoughts, feelings, and motherly anger to God, I’m saying, “I will not walk in it.” By not taking the yoke of Jesus, you are saying, “I will not walk in it.”
Sister, weary, tired mom— understand that when you choose to not walk in the way He provides for us, you are ultimately rejecting the promise of rest. This answers the question, Why am I weary?
dear tired mom: accept his promise.
Please join me in accepting this promise. I have a feeling we won’t regret it. That means we have to lay down our want to finish our to-do lists; our need to have the best-looking house or Instagram-worthy craft-making time; and our desire to raise the most perfect, godly children. Jesus didn’t offer to help Martha around the house so she could serve harder and expend more energy, creating the perfect experience for her guests. Jesus gently reminded her that her sister, Mary, chose to do what was important at that moment. In a way, I believe He was telling Martha to take His yoke upon her, right then and there. I also believe that most days, He whispers the same to us.
Rest for our souls begins with laying down our burdens and sitting at His feet.
So, come on. I saved a spot for you.
Won’t you join me?
Motherhood for the Glory of God
Who is on the throne in your household— you or the Lord? Oftentimes, as mothers, we make our own grand designs in our heads. We have all the plans. We’ve thought through all of the contingencies. We have all…
Oftentimes, as mothers, we make our own grand designs in our heads. We have all the plans. We’ve thought through all of the contingencies. We have all of the details laid out. Then, we sit on our mama throne, in our own little motherhood kingdom, and watch the plans unfold–
Directing paths, giving instructions, and keeping everyone on task. When all is well, great. What a happy day. But, when things don’t work out the way we’ve planned, attitudes get sour, tempers get short, and patience runs thin.
Oh, that’s just me?
Ok.
Motherhood is one of the greatest joys we’ll ever have the privilege of experiencing. It also provides us with one of the greatest opportunities to misplace our position of authority if we aren’t careful. In other words, motherhood can be done for the glory of God, or for the glory of ourselves.
It’s a thin line to tread and it’s easy to step on the wrong side. At the end of the day, as mothers, we need to ask ourselves, are we building the Lord’s kingdom, or ours?
Our Kingdom, or His?
We can’t be too careful about where we place our focus, sister. The Lord has called us to be mothers, and it’s such an important job. Great tasks call for great responsibility, especially when it comes to the little lives we have charge over.
There are so many things to do in the area of motherhood, right? Sometimes it can be hard to keep the main thing, the main thing. The Lord, in His wisdom, His care, and His love calls us to seek Him first. He knows the number one thing we need is Him, or nothing else makes sense. When we do keep Him in first place, it’s much easier to keep the right perspective.
RELATED: How to Find Rest in Motherhood
Without Him as our main focus, we can easily get busy building our own kingdom while we let God’s kingdom fall to the waste side. Our rules, our objectives, our plans, and our purposes. We can think what we’re doing with our kids is building God's kingdom, but sometimes we’re simply making sure our own little kingdom is in proper order.
As mothers, we can become comfortable within our own walls and in our own heads. So much so, that our comfortability traps us in a state of disobedience.
Yes, even if we’re doing all the right things, all the spiritual disciplines, and partaking in all the biblical parenting advice we can find. Within all of these wonderful practices, we can still be too busy maneuvering through our kingdom to be obedient.
A Lesson from the Book of Haggai
I love diving into some of the lesser-referenced books of the Bible; the book of Haggai is one of them. There are some powerful truths we can find when we take the time to study the Word and inquire of the Holy Spirit for wisdom and understanding of the message being conveyed.
Haggai was a prophet in the days when the Jewish exiles returned home after 70 years of captivity in Babylon. God used him to encourage the people to stop being complacent and comfortable in their own homes, and instead get back to rebuilding the Temple.
They needed some motivation because priorities were a little out of whack. They were focused on themselves, their own lives, and their own agendas. They labored, ran their households, and provided for their families– indeed, they weren’t idle. Yet, they weren’t doing the main thing. They were comfortable in their own little kingdoms, you could say.
Sound like anything we just talked about?
I love the Lord’s instruction to the people:
“Thus says the Lord of hosts: “Consider your ways!” ”
It’s as if the Lord is calling out: Wake up. Pay attention. Think about what you’re doing!
Is it our work, or the Lord’s work? And, even if it is for the Lord, is it what He is actually calling us to do right now, in His timing, in His way?
Kingdom Building with a Badge of Busyness
Let’s consider our ways, fellow mama.
We can inadvertently put on our badge of busyness, too physically and mentally frantic taking care of our own world to focus on what the Lord has for us. All of our sights can be set on the short-term aspects of our lives— so much so that we give very little thought to what matters long term.
You see, as mothers, we can live a life for the glory of God. We can wipe noses, change diapers, and cook meals for the glory of God. We can, and we should do all things for the glory of God (1 Corinthians 13:31).
However, sister, we should be mindful to not get lost in all of those things. Can we tend to these immediate needs without losing sight of what the Lord is calling us to do for His kingdom, big picture? Because I don’t know what you, but these immediate needs– albeit tending to them does show Christ’s love to our families– leave me exhausted by the end of the day. Sometimes, as I’m living a life focused on the daily tasks, I’m left with very little energy to set my sights on the Lord’s kingdom. It’s all about my kingdom and how I want it to run.
Maybe that’s how the people of Haggai’s day felt.
Unchecked Priorities
The Lord called for a drought on all the labors of the Jewish people’s hands (Haggai 1:11) because they did not have their priorities straight. Their walls were beautiful and comfortable, while the Lord’s Temple was left unfinished. They were focused on themselves and not the Lord.
Their priorities were not in their proper place– but not just their priorities. In fact, they lacked the fear of the Lord.
Yet, once the people feared the Lord (their reverence was in the proper place), the Lord stirred them to continue their work on the temple (Haggai 1:12-14). As Proverbs shares, we need to begin with the fear of the Lord; it is the beginning of wisdom and knowledge (Proverbs 1:7). It is the start of our trust in and obedience to God.
When we’re on our thrones, we want our children to fear us and do what we say; we want them to revere us. Until we step down from our fabricated throne, there’s no room for the Lord to be on the throne in our hearts and our households.
Kingdom Building the Better Way
And, sister, as we enter into the realm of doing the Lord’s work and will for His glory– not ours– He is faithful to step alongside us (Haggai 2:4).
RELATED: Living for the Lord on Purpose
We see this as the Jewish people in Haggai’s day began working on the Temple again. They had to leave the comfort of their homes and jettison their own priorities in order to be faithful to what the Lord wanted them to do NOW. In doing so, the Lord promised that the new Temple would be one far greater than the former; more glorious. He promised it would provide a place of peace (Haggai 2:9).
Like those God called to focus on rebuilding the Temple, we too have to give up our own agendas and be mindful that we’re carrying out the Lord’s. It may be scary. It may be exhausting. It may be so much more uncomfortable than the way we’re running our household now. But, sister, the Lord promises that His way will be one that brings peace.
His way for our families will be better than anything we could do solely through the labor of our own hands.
Put Your Reverence in the Right Place: Free Psalms Bible Study
Dive deeper into the Word and focus on God’s tremendous love for you in your motherhood journey with this 16-page Bible Study. You’ll take a look at Psalms that shout God’s faithfulness, call you to praise Him louder, and trust Him more deeply.
Warning: For the Glory of God…or Not?
At one point, the Lord prompts Haggai to ask the priests about how things become holy, unclean, and defiled. They respond by basically saying that things do not become holy merely by touch or by being in a specific place. Yet, things can be defiled by touch or presence. (Haggai 2:11-14).
What does this have to do with us– those of us who are children of God, living under grace, in Christ?
Follow me, sister. We can easily think that all is well and good in our house because we are a Christian family, or because we say we live a lifestyle that is biblical. We’re doing family devotions, quiet times before the Lord, going to church, and being mindful to train up our children biblically.
Yet, if we’re just going through the motions, doing our duties with hearts that are absent of surrender unto Him, things are not all well and good. If we aren’t being obedient to the Lord daily, yielding and submitting to His will for our lives– in the big and little things– dare I say that our disobedience “defiles” us.
It may look like we’re living for the glory of God, but really, it’s a façade because something is missing– obedience.
Our disobedience, be it ever so subtle, puts us in a position where we’re at odds with the Lord, going against His grain. The labor of our hands is not an acceptable sacrifice to Him. Or, perhaps we are walking in step with His plans, but our attitude is sour and we’re grumbling; unfortunately, that’s not a good look either!
Obedience—physically and by way of the attitude of our hearts— is better than sacrifice (1 Samuel 15:22).
But, praise God, sister, that we can please the Lord! We have the ability. Through the power of the Holy Spirit working within us, our desires can line up with the Lord’s; we can willingly surrender our throne to Him; and we can delight in Him. Motherhood can be done for the glory of God alone– by God’s grace. Let us not lose heart.
RELATED: How to Pursue Righteousness
How do we consider our ways?
When we consider our ways and are mindful to be obedient to the Lord, He will bless us. We’ll see changes in our lives and the lives of our families. But first, we need to take an honest look to determine whose throne is in our household.
Is our motherhood being lived out for the glory of God? Let us consider our ways with 7 reflective questions:
Is there an abundance of peace in our households, or continual strife?
How upset do we get when our children don’t obey every little thing?
Do we see times of disobedience as teachable moments or strictly as our children’s failure to fall in line?
Are we spending difficult moments in prayer or in frustration?
How often do we ask for the Lord’s wisdom?
Is our to-do list so pressing that it leaves no room for the Spirit’s promptings to direct us throughout the day?
Do our children understand that in parental obedience they are learning to obey the Lord? Or does the buck stop with us?
Are we willing to let God overthrow our kingdom?
He will, sister, and it’ll be for the better. Just because we aren’t sitting on our thrones anymore, doesn’t mean we have no authority. God placed us as mothers in our households and He still has important work for us to do. He simply wants us to yield to Him as the ultimate Ruler, not to hold all the power in our own hands.
Shall we let our kingdoms fall and His rise? I believe so. His is more glorious. And in His kingdom, there is peace.
More in motherhood
The Comparisons of a Christian Woman
Comparisons. There are opportunities all around us– all the time. All day, every day. But, is comparing yourself to others a good thing, sister? Whether you’re…
The mother in the school pick-up line. The new mom whose photo on Instagram flaunts the fact that she is back to her pre-baby weight. The kids who are reading two grade levels ahead of yours. And, the kids who are running amuck in the clothing store and you’re glad they’re not yours.
Comparisons.
There are opportunities all around us– all the time. All day, every day. But, is comparing yourself to others a good thing, sister?
Whether you’re the victim or the hero of the comparison, coming to a mental space where you can stop comparing yourself to others is monumental in your walk with the Lord.
While we can think it’s trivial or even insignificant to compare, and that it leads to little or no repercussions, the Word of God paints a different truth for us.
Sister, you are made in the image of God, handcrafted by God, His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them (Ephesians 2:10 ESV).
So– if all of that is true, then you should know, trust, and believe that God did not make any mistakes making you, you. He not only has specific purposes and plans for you, but also specific works for which you were specially created to walk out.
Therefore, it’s unfruitful to compare because your hand-crafted path is your path, and not for anyone but you. That also means that others’ paths are not for you either, right?
The Dangers of Comparing Yourself to Others
We are fearfully and wonderfully made by our creative, powerful, all-knowing God. He has made each of us according to His omniscience and will. He doesn’t make mistakes.
We can rest in that.
Comparing yourself to others never brings about the joy and happiness that so many seek for their lives. We know this before we start playing the game, yet we still end up playing, expecting different results. Or, perhaps it's just a habit.
Based on my personal experience, I've noticed that comparisons can lead to a few unfruitful attitudes that harm our walk with the Lord:
Discontentment
1 Timothy 6:6 tells us that contentment should accompany godliness, and when it does, it proves to be a great gain. Why? Because all we have comes from the Lord, and when we realize this truth, we focus more on His goodness and His provision– not on what we don't have (which becomes so clear when all we do is compare!).
It's so easy to be unhappy with our own life when we compare it with the life of someone who seems to be doing better than us. Yet, when we are mindful to look to Jesus, seek His will for our life, and realize that in His omniscience He gives to each one of us as He wills, we can know, trust, and believe that our life is what He desires for it to be.
In short: The Lord’s goal for us isn’t happiness. Seeking the Lord and His will leads to contentment in Him. Comparisons lead to discontentment.
Pride
Yes, pride. For most, thoughts of comparing yourself to others come from the perspective of seeing others as greater. However, there are always two sides to a coin.
Comparisons can lead to a sense of pride when we view our life, situation, or circumstances as the greater one (or maybe pride was already there, and the comparisons just made it come to light).
“For who considers you as superior? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as if you had not received it? ”
We live in a world where people believe they are gods of their own information, thoughts, and opinions. If someone doesn't agree with their viewpoint, there is a sense of arrogance and pride that ensues. Many believe that the only “truth” that exists is what their opinion represents.
But, we have no right to consider ourselves superior to others. We have no room to boast unless we are boasting in the Lord, for He has given us everything (1 Corinthians 4:7). He is the Truth– not our thoughts and opinions.
Comparisons put us in a place where we're only thinking about ourselves, either positively (pride), or negatively (discontentment), and not thinking about Jesus.
Envy
Sister, when we don’t rest in the fact that God has given us His best for our lives in His creation of us, it’s easy to long for something “more.” More wealth, more beauty, more followers, more status. But God’s Word tells us in James 3:16 that disorder and every evil thing come from jealousy and selfish ambition.
This envy begins in our hearts, manifests in our thoughts, words, and attitudes, and then seeps out into our environment. Envy is felt like tension, so thick you can cut it with a proverbial knife. It’s not good, sister.
Again, we know this, but when we’re stuck in the mindset of comparing ourselves to others, it’s the “natural” route to take.
But oftentimes, the Lord’s ways are not what seems natural. It’s not the easy route. Focusing on Jesus can be more challenging than focusing on all of the tangible things we see right in front of us.
However, it’s necessary. Our walk only keeps to the Lord’s path if we walk in the Lord’s ways. He directs our steps and lights our path for a reason. We only stumble when we step off the path.
Reasons to stop comparing yourself to others
There are so many reasons why comparing is not good, but let’s focus on these two really big ones. When we’re stuck in the habit of comparing ourselves to others, there’s not a lot of room left to see our lives through His eyes. And here’s what the Lord desires for us to remember:
We don’t exist to please people.
We’re indeed to be a light in this dark world and serve people, but in doing so, the intention of our hearts should not be to please people.
If it is, then we’re doing it for the wrong reasons.
We exist to be a bondservant of Christ, living to please Him. If we’re constantly seeking to please other people and find favor in their eyes, they’ve become our god and we’ve become their bond-servants, not Christ’s (Galatians 1:10).
We only need to look to Jesus as our standard.
Hebrews 12:2 calls Jesus the “author (or originator) and perfecter of our faith. If it is from Him and through Him and to Him that all things flow, including our faith, then why do we take our eyes off of Him so often, and let others trip us up? We know that if we’re running a race, the blinders must stay on— we shouldn’t run while looking in the stands or on the sidelines to see what else is going on. Yet, our Christian walk consists of this mistake so often.
We see the beautiful photos highlighting what this mom did with her kid last week. We sit and contemplate what that mom’s little did at this morning’s playgroup. We wonder why the mom at the grocery store had angelic children who walked quietly at her side, while ours ran up and down the aisles. Or, we think, “so glad that’s not my child” when we see a mom with a screaming toddler waiting in the checkout line.
All of these mental antics are evidence we are playing the comparison game, sister. We are letting the obstacles and the sin which so easily ensnares us trip us up (Hebrews 12:-1) because we’re focused on the sidelines.
And, do you notice that Jesus’s name isn't a part of any of these scenarios? None of the above had anything to do with the One who holds us all together.
That's because when you're comparing yourself to others you're not thinking about Jesus.
He and He alone is our standard. We look to Him for our decisions in how we raise our children and carry out the gift we've been given as mothers.
Let's be mindful to remember that, as the Author of our faith, what He has for us and our child is what He has for us– even if it looks drastically different than the life of the mom next door. No two faith walks and journeys through motherhood will look the same– so we need to stop expecting it to.
How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others: 5 Practical Tips
When you’re mindful to keep your eyes on the Lord, and not everyone else, major things can happen. Here are a few practical ways you can do so.
#1: Focus on the Word of God.
Make time for God. Spend time studying the Bible and growing in your walk with Him. As you study the Word, you grow in His wisdom and gain a perspective in life that truly matters– His perspective. Focus more on who He is, and less time on who you think you should be.
#2: Read Ephesians 2.
How often do you think about who you are in Christ? I know the world wants you to think about whether or not we’re following the latest fashion trend and if the lighting for your last selfie was good enough. But body types and beauty standards don’t define you. Christ does. His definitions for you trump all hashtags on your social feeds. Grab your Bible and read His Words so you don’t fall for the lies.
RELATED: Modern-Day Idols That Trip Us Up
#3: Trust God for your contentment.
As Paul says in Philippians 4:11-12, you too can be content, no matter your circumstances. Remember, it is the Lord who supplies you with all you need for life and godliness (2 Peter 1:3), and gives you things for your enjoyment (1 Timothy 6:17). You need to look no further than Him. And, sister– you don’t have to strive for it. He freely blesses those who trust and rely on Him. You may not have everything you want, but rest assured, in Him, you have everything you need.
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#4: Live for Christ.
When you live a life that is in constant communication with the Lord, yielding to the Spirit’s promptings and work in your life, you’ll remain on the right path. Your mind will be focused on His plans and purposes for you, so much so that it’ll be as if you have spiritual blinders blocking your peripheral vision. You’ll be forward-focused, not allowing the world’s ways to infiltrate you from the side.
This is what I mean by you being a woman created on purpose. You know that you were not only created on purpose, but that your heart, soul, and mind are set on the purpose He has for you– and you are determined to walk in it.
#5: Take a break from social media…
…or remove it from your life altogether! Social media just shares the highlights of others’ lives– every day doesn’t look like that for them. You know this, yet it’s still easy to get caught up in comparing your worst to someone else’s best.
“A woman created on purpose has her heart, soul, and mind set on the purpose He has for her– and she is determined to walk in it.”
You are fearfully and wonderfully made, sister!
There’s no need to feel that you must be anything other than what God wants for you. There’s no “better path” than the one the Lord has for you. Allow Him to guide you. Trust in Him, not in your own understanding or perspective of the situation. Live life to glorify Him and Him alone. His way is enough.
RELATED: How to See the Lord How He Sees You
Bible verses about comparison
Not only are there numerous Bible verses about comparison, but if we read closely, we’ll find the truth in why there just simply is no need to do so. The Lord has better things for us. He didn’t create each of us individually unique so that we could spend our time focused on why we’re better than her, or she’s better than us.
He created us differently because He is a creative God, and He wants us to see the many facets of who He is through all aspects of His creation.
Here are a few more verses about comparison, and I encourage you to comb the Scriptures for more truth about the dangers of comparing yourself to others.
But each one must examine his own work, and then he will have reason for boasting, but to himself alone, and not to another. For each one will bear his own load. -Galatians 6:4-5 NASB
For we do not presume to rank or compare ourselves with some of those who commend themselves; but when they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they have no understanding. -2 Corinthians 10:12 NASB
Do not judge, so that you will not be judged. -Matthew 7:1 NASB
Jesus said to him, “If I want him to remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow Me!” -John 21:22 NASB
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An Evening Routine that Honors the Lord
Maybe for you, the night is your time to shine. You’re perky, peppy, and love burning the midnight oil. If so, then creating a God-honoring nighttime routine will…
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One of my favorite things about summer on the East Coast of the US is that the sun stays out until almost 9:00 PM. Yes, I love that long light. I love the nighttime darkness that just doesn’t seem to want to come. Even though it makes it tough to put the little ones to bed because it’s “still daytime,” I enjoy it.
While there are many things about fall that stir my heart to happiness, I don’t look forward to the sun getting low before 7:00 PM. As the nights get longer and longer, darkness fills the streets and our homes for what seems to be an infinite number of hours each day, pushing the sun away harder and harder as we slide into the winter months.
Yes, I’m being a bit dramatic. But honestly, darkness just isn’t my thing— not the literal darkness that comes with the absence of daytime light, and not the sinful darkness that comes with the absence of the Light.
You get my drift, sister?
This darkness sweeps in and tends to stay for a visit much longer the more we forsake our quiet time with God. Spending time with the Lord each day in prayer and through studying the Bible is key. It’s what keeps our hearts in the right place, humbly bowed before Him and having a proper perspective of ourselves and the world.
Even in the darkness of night, you can still dwell in the Light.
Maybe for you, the night is your time to shine. You’re perky, peppy, and love burning the midnight oil. If so, then creating a God-honoring nighttime routine will help you grow in your faith and remain close to the Lord.
If a Morning Routine or an Afternoon Routine isn’t for you, let’s talk about the way the Lord can work in the hearts of you night owls.
How to Prepare for your Quiet Time with God
Before jumping into a new routine, especially one as crucial as your quiet time with God, it’s best to seek the Lord to determine all He has for you. Walking into anything in your own strength leads to doubts, struggles, and low commitment levels. Trust me, I’ve been there– I know!
There are a few things we can do to help us prepare for our quiet time with God:
#1: PRAY and ask the Lord to help you be consistent in your schedule.
Is the evening really the time of day the Lord wants you to have your quiet time? If so, ask Him to help you block off your schedule and commit. A wishy-washy commitment to Him equals a wishy-washy faith.
#2: FIND A specific TIME THAT WORKS FOR YOU.
Since the evening is the last portion of the day, it truly is now or never. If you’ve gone all day without cracking open your Bible and spending time in the Word, the evening is your last shot. Pray and ask God for a specific and exact time in your schedule each day for your quiet time.
#3: PICK A SPECIAL SPOT in your house to study the Word.
As I shared in my Morning Routine and Afternoon Routine articles, whether it’s a favorite chair or a quiet room, selecting a place where you have your quiet time with God each day helps you stay consistent. After a while, this place will mentally become synonymous with your quiet time.
Does that sound silly? Well, think of your workplace or your laundry room. As soon as you step into that building or room, you know exactly what you’re supposed to do there because that’s the main thing you always do in that particular place. It’s the same way with your “quiet time place.” Soon, you won’t be able to walk by that couch, coffee shop, or desk without the gentle reminder that it’s time for quiet time.
What Studying the Bible Does for Us
Studying the Bible is more than just an item we check off of our to-do list. It’s an important, crucial, and necessary spiritual discipline every believer should have. No matter the season of life we’re in, we can never—let me repeat, sister— never be too busy to read God’s Word.
I shared the importance of reading God’s Word in my Morning Routine and Afternoon Routine articles. If you missed that, take a look at those articles:
READ: A Morning Routine that Honors the Lord
READ: An Afternoon Routine that Honors the Lord
But now, let’s take a moment to focus on a few things that studying the Bible does for us, through the lens of Proverbs 6.
“My son, comply with the commandment of your father,
And do not ignore the teaching of your mother;
Bind them continually on your heart;
Tie them around your neck.
When you walk, they will guide you;
When you sleep, they will watch over you;
And when you awake, they will talk to you.
For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching is light;
And rebukes for discipline are the way of life.”
Firstly, there is an urgency and persistence we see being given. We are to be sure to not only comply, or keep, the commands, but to also be mindful that we are not blatantly ignoring the Word. We should hear the Word, and keep it.
And not just keep it, but to continually bind it on our hearts. Continually.
The only way something gets imprinted on our hearts is for us to be exposed to it over and over. There is a repetitive process that must happen so that the Word becomes ingrained and interwoven into the fabric of our lives.
This is what studying the Bible does for us. And when we do so, God’s Word permeates our being, bringing us more clarity, perspective, and direction than we could ever muster up for ourselves.
God’s Word guides us as we walk through the trials, decisions, contemplations, and joys of life. We’re able to discern God’s promises from the world’s ways when we have an accurate view and knowledge of who He is.
The Word of God keeps us as we sleep, providing the peace that only Jesus can give us. There is less room for fear, doubt, and anxiety when the Word is bound in our hearts.
When we’re awake, God’s Word speaks to us from the depths of our souls, making plain His Will versus the world’s devices and deception. The Holy Spirit will bring specific verses to mind in our time of need. He will remind us of God’s promises, faithfulness, and wisdom in the little and big things of life.
God’s Word is always ready to light our path, showing us the way to go.
Yet, when we forsake studying the Bible regularly, we allow this light to go dim. We quench the Holy Spirit more easily. We have less peace and more doubt. We lead ourselves. All of these things happen because, even if it’s just for a moment, we’ve forgotten who He is.
10 Steps to a Quiet Time with God in the Evening
In our quiet time with God, as we pray and study, we will be drawn closer to Him. This is something to take seriously, and I exhort you, sister, to find a time of day—daily— that works for you!
If it’s the evening, here are some tips to help you get started.
#1: Put your scheduled time in your calendar every night.
Set up a calendar reminder or alarm, if needed. If you know you have an event happening during your normal quiet time, plan in advance to have your quiet time earlier in the day.
#2: commit to keeping your scheduled time, no matter how tired you are.
Know you are going to have busy, eventful days that tire you out. But, God doesn’t deserve your leftovers. Give Him the time, energy, and commitment of which He is worthy! Reserve some energy for your Lord.
#3: Realize this isn’t legalism.
Although your quiet time with God is undeniably the most important piece of your day, give yourself a little grace. If you miss it or have to cut the time short, remember that the Lord isn’t angry with you. Just purpose to do better in your planning tomorrow.
#4: Wait until the kiddos are off to bed and the house is quieter.
I don’t know about yours, but my kids don’t exactly put the “quiet” in quiet time! If you want to be able to study the Bible with little distraction, pick a time where you can truly relax in the quietness of your home.
RELATED: 22 Ways to Make Time for God as Busy Mom
#5: Know your limit.
Even though you’re likely a night owl, at some point, dear sister, I know tiredness kicks in and you’ve had enough for the day. If you tend to crash quickly once exhaustion sets in, purpose to not make your quiet time the very last thing you do before bedtime. The last thing you want is to fall asleep in your Bible every night before you’ve really gotten to soak up the Word.
#6: Communicate with your spouse.
If you’re married, and this is a time you regularly spend catching up with your spouse, be sure to talk to him before making a change to your “married couple” time. Find something that works for both of you.
#7: Prepare your study tools earlier in the day.
The better prepared you are beforehand, the more likely you will complete the task at hand (this goes for anything!). If you have to scurry around at night looking for your things when you’re already getting tired, the less time you’ll spend before the Lord. Grab your Bible, pens, journal, or whatever you need early in the day, and place them in your designated quiet time spot so you’re ready to go.
FLOURISH DURING YOUR EVENING QUIET TIME WITH GOD
Looking for a place to start in your Bible study time? Dive deeper into the Word and focus on God’s tremendous love for you in this 16-page Bible Study of the Psalms. Fill out the form below.
#8: Turn off the screens!
Unless you’re using a Bible app on your phone for study references, try to keep your phone, computer, and TV out of sight! It can be tempting to wind down at night via screen time, but leave the social media scrolling and TV show-binging until after your quiet time with God is concluded.
RELATED: 5 Surprising Ways Moms Waste Time
#9: Pray before you start.
No matter what time of day, pray and ask the Lord to reveal to you more of Himself in your time together. Ask for minimal distractions, and a heart to stay as focused as possible on Him and His Word.
#10: Let go of the day.
There are probably tasks you felt you needed to do earlier in the day that you didn’t get to. Let them all go. Don’t allow the never-ending items on your to-do list to cloud your time with the Lord. There will always be something to do, work on, or complete. Follow the Lord’s leading and keep the most important thing, the most important thing.
“But his delight is in the Law of the Lord, and on His Law he meditates day and night.”
Sleep Tight, Sister
We can keep the Lord the main focus of our lives, no matter what time of day we set aside to commune with Him. He never sleeps nor slumbers (Psalm 121:3), and He is always ready to welcome you into His presence. No matter how weary you are, how your day went, or how bright-eyed and energetic you may be at 10:00 PM, He wants to hear from you. Bask in the Lord and His goodness. Allow His Word to strengthen you, gently lead you, and give you the peace you need for a restful sleep. When you rest in the safety of His care and under the shadow of His wings, you will surely sleep tight.
An Afternoon Routine that Honors the Lord
When the afternoon weariness sets in, we turn to the next cup of coffee, our favorite podcast, or maybe a walk around the block to revive us. All of these things are great, but they don’t…
Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. That means if you click the link and make a purchase, I receive a small commission. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. This is at no extra cost to you, but it helps me to further serve you in your walk with the Lord!
This one is for all the weary mamas. And, you know what– it’s for the energetic, pumped up, “get it done” mamas too. We’re all somewhere within that spectrum on any given day, and at any given moment. We all need a little boost of encouragement to help us flourish in our motherhood for the remainder of the day.
The problem is, that many of us are looking for that boost of encouragement in all the wrong places.
When the afternoon weariness sets in, we turn to the next cup of coffee, our favorite podcast, or maybe a walk around the block to revive us. All of these things are great, do not misunderstand me. Yet, they don’t fully revive and restore our souls the way the Word of God does.
In the first part of this series on routines, we focused on the early-bird mamas and how to create a morning routine– but not just any old morning routine– one that honors the Lord.
Starting the day in the presence of the Lord certainly sets the tone for the remainder of the day. But, if morning Bible study time is not what the Lord is calling you to in this season of your life, hang on! Don’t put off your daily meeting with God just because time has escaped you. You can still have a beautiful, intimate time with the Lord when the clock rotates to those “PM” hours.
The fact of the matter is that spending time with God is what matters, not the hours on the clock. So whether you have an effective morning routine, afternoon routine, or your Bible time comes hours after sunset, you can still make the Lord a priority, any time of day.
How to Prepare for Your Afternoon Routine
Mornings can be hectic when you need to get everyone up and out of the house on time. When I was a full-time working mom, my mornings did not include a beautiful, serene quiet time before the Lord! I know many working moms who have different stories, but just know that your story is your story, and you have permission to seek the Lord and what He desires for you in this season of your life.
Afternoon routines can work well for working moms, homeschool moms, or even stay-at-home moms with infants who keep them up all hours of the night. No matter what your situation, remember that the Lord is always present with us– in every moment and circumstance; during every task.
It is our job to be diligent to take our eyes off the tasks at hand and instead set aside time to focus our full attention on Him with no (planned) interruptions or distractions.
We’re talking about coming before the Lord– the Creator of the universe, the Great I AM, the Almighty God! How amazing is it that, as His daughters, we get to have a regular calendar appointment with Him, whenever we want?!
But, before creating a God-honoring afternoon routine, I think it’s essential to do a few things:
#1: Pray to find a time of day that works for you.
First, determine whether the Lord truly wants to you have your quiet time in the afternoon. You may think that’s the best time, but He may have other plans! If the afternoon is His will, then seek the Lord in what specific time in the afternoon to block off.
Whatever time of day you prayerfully choose, ask the Lord to remove obstacles you may face day to day.
#2: Pray and ask the Lord to help you be consistent in your schedule.
We all know that the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak (Matthew 26:41). We may truly want to be consistent, but distractions, calendar changes, and outside influences can easily throw us off track.
Pray for strength each day, so you don’t constantly give into your flesh.
#3: Decide where you will do your quiet time.
We’re creatures of routine and habit. Pick a special spot to study the Word, whether it’s a favorite chair, your car, a park bench, or a quiet room. Eventually, this place will become mentally synonymous with your quiet time.
The Importance of Spending Time with God
Spending time with God is more than just taking out our cute journals, pens, and beautifully-bound leather Bible, and doodling in the margins. While there are numerous methods we can use to study the Word, it’s not about finding the perfect technique.
Above all else, spending time with God is about communing with the Father— the One who created you, who loves you, and desires a close relationship with you. And, we can only have close relationships with those we spend time with, right?
“Make me understand the way of your precepts, and I will meditate on your wondrous works.
My soul melts away for sorrow; strengthen me according to your word!
Put false ways far from me and graciously teach me your law!
I have chosen the way of faithfulness; I set your rules before me.”
Reading the Word of God gives us a better understanding of who God is, what He’s done, and what He desires for our lives.
As we see in Psalm 119, when we prayerfully read and meditate on Scripture, God gives us an understanding of His Word. He shows us the path we’re to take, gently leading us to take off our false, fleshly ways and leave them in the past.
Spending time with God gives us the desire to choose the Lord’s way— one of faithfulness because He is faithful.
So, sister— let’s not forsake the Father’s heart for us. There will always be time for the tasks that need to be completed, no matter how small or how significant. Yes– be responsible and fulfill the commitments He has entrusted you with; however, even in doing so, put Him above all else on your priority list.
STAY FOCUSED DURING YOUR AFTERNOON ROUTINE
Download this set of FREE Bible Study Printables to assist you during your quiet time! This 5-page download includes a place to take notes, create a weekly or monthly reading plan, and capture verses that speak to your heart. Fill out the form below.
10 Hassle-Free Steps to Creating an Afternoon Routine
Just like creating a God-honoring morning routine doesn’t have to be difficult, neither does building an afternoon routine. Remember– spending time with God is about spending time with God– not about perfection.
#1: Mark your calendar.
Once you determine a time, mark it as a daily appointment in your calendar. This will help you stay consistent and remind you to schedule other appointments around it.
#2: Eliminate distractions.
There are so many things in our lives that determine to waste our time. Turn off the TV, put your phone on silent, and vow to check emails later. Menial tasks and entertainment can wait.
#3: Understand that this is your shot.
Since the morning has come and gone, and your evening can quickly become busy with dinner, activities, and bedtime routines, this may be your best shot at uninterrupted quiet time. Sister, don’t waste it! It’s not the time to skimp on spending time with God or put it off until later. Don’t let the enemy deceive you into believing that there is something more pressing to do.
#4: Be Prepared.
First thing in the morning, or perhaps even the night before, gather your Bible and any study materials, such as journals or pens, that you’ll need during your quiet time. Pack them in your bag if your afternoon quiet time will happen outside of the home, or put them in your study spot in your home. You don’t want to waste time scurrying around last minute when you could jump into the Word immediately.
#5: If you’re home, put aside household tasks.
Lunch clean-up, dishes, and laundry can wait! Mama, you don’t have to strive for the Pinterest-perfect house in each moment. Be a little more Mary and less Martha during this time.
#6: If you’re home, make it a big deal with your kids.
Explain to them what you’re doing, why you don’t want interruptions, and give them a few things to do to occupy themselves during the time. They may distract you at first, but if you stay consistent, eventually they will come to realize that this is an important time that mommy has with God. It may even impact them so much that they’ll be encouraged to have their own quiet time!
#7: If you're home, utilize nap time.
If you still have afternoon nappers in the house, first of all— hallelujah, right?! A child’s nap time can be such a refreshing time for a weary mama’s soul when used properly; yet, it can easily be a time to get a little lazy, binge a bit of Netflix, or take a scroll through Facebook. But, I think the Lord has better things for us. This is the perfect time to spend time with God in the quietness of your house, and many times, the only uninterrupted time you may get during the day. Put God time first, then do a few other things for yourself that you enjoy in the time you have left.
#8: If you’re a homeschool mom, work your quiet time into your homeschool day!
Schedule it as a time when your children can be independent in their work for a bit. Or, make it a scheduled part of their curriculum whereas everyone, including mom, has “Bible Time.” You could even take turns discussing what everyone read when quiet time is over.
#9: If you’re at work, utilize your lunch break.
The 30 minutes to an hour of freedom you have every day is golden. Don’t overlook how much you can get done in this brief amount of time. Eating and studying the Word simultaneously works great! Just stay focused.
#10: If you’re at work, find a spot where you can sit quietly alone.
When I was a working mom, there were so many times I’d go sit in my car to read! If an alone spot is not possible, politely ask your co-workers to not disturb you (and who knows how they’ll be impacted by seeing you read the Bible daily!).
“There’s no such thing as perfect balance— the Lord’s importance should always outweigh everything else on your life’s scale.”
Above all else, Pray.
No matter where your quiet time will happen, your afternoon routine will eventually fall to pieces if you don’t pray first! Start your time in prayer, asking the Lord to eliminate external distractions, internal dialogue, and thoughts. Ask Him to help you focus on His Word, give you an understanding of the text, and a willingness to receive all that He has for you during the time.
Encouragement for Spending Time with God
Sister– seasons change, schedules change, and circumstances change. But God and His Word do not change. Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8). He is always ready for us to come to Him. It’s our job to make the choice and decision to do so.
Not once. Not sometimes. But, consistently and regularly.
Spending time with God is one of the most crucial tools in our arsenal to help us not only grow in our own faith, but to be equipped to train up our children in the way they should go (Proverbs 22:6). So whether it’s in the afternoon, morning, or evening, just choose, sister. Choose Jesus. His counsel. His instruction.
He’s ready for your lunch meeting tomorrow! Are you?
Don’t stand Him up.
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Creating a Morning Routine that Honors the Lord
Moms, we must make time for God. Does your morning routine reflect that? No matter how busy we are, God has entrusted us with the lives of tiny humans, giving us the privilege and responsibility to…
Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. That means if you click the link and make a purchase, I receive a small commission. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. This is at no extra cost to you, but it helps me to further serve you in your walk with the Lord!
Motherhood is hard. But mama, you know what? It doesn’t have to be as hard as we make it sometimes. Jesus calls us to come to Him and give Him our burdens when we’re weary; and to cast our cares on Him.
Are you in the habit of doing that, sister?
Full disclosure– sometimes I do; but, often I don’t. Many times I get overwhelmed, worried, and anxious in my parenting. There are so many things to do, schedules to manage, places to be, and people to care for.
But God.
God can handle all the things. He will calm our hearts, give us peace, and gently lead us in the direction we should go– if we let Him.
I’ve found that I struggle with these negative (and unnecessary) feelings the most when I am not seeking Him and studying the Word regularly. This happens when my morning routine is slacking and lacking.
Moms– we must, must, must find a way to make time for God. No matter how busy we are. God has entrusted us with the lives of tiny humans, giving us the privilege and responsibility to raise them to be productive citizens in society, who fear the Lord. In my opinion, this is the most important job in the world.
Therefore, we have no excuse. Yup, I said it! No excuse. These little eyes, hearts, and minds depend on us to train them up in the way they should go.
Yet, if we aren’t taking the time to allow the Lord to continue to train us up, how can we in turn expect to have the godly wisdom and knowledge to pass on to our children?
RELATED: 22 Tips for Making Time for God as a Busy Mom
How to Prepare for your Morning Routine
Creating an effective morning routine as a Christian mom is more than doing small and sometimes insignificant things to make your day more productive. You can find a lot of tips, tricks, and articles on the web about general morning routines.
Sis– that’s not what we’re going to focus on today, ok?
Here at A Woman Created On Purpose, I feel called to equip you in your walk with the Lord. So let’s use our time wisely and focus on the things that are actually important to the Lord, shall we?
So, when I say morning routine, I’m not talking about making the perfect cup of coffee, or what music to listen to as you work out (not that coffee, music, and working out are bad– I love all of those things!).
What I’m talking about is coming before the Lord. And, since coming before the Lord is such a major thing, before creating the perfect morning routine, I think it’s important to do a few things:
#1: PRAY. ask the Lord to help you be consistent in your schedule.
We all know that the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak (Matthew 26:41). You may truly want to have a consistent quiet time with the Lord in the morning; but, late nights, overnight feedings, or draining schedules leave moms weary in the mornings.
Pray for strength each morning, so you don’t constantly give into your flesh.
#2: Decide where you will do your quiet time.
Pick a special spot in your house to study the Word, whether it’s a favorite chair or a quiet room. Eventually, this place will become mentally synonymous with your quiet time.
#3: Find a time of day that works for you.
Since you’re reading the “Morning Routines” article, I’m assuming you’ve chosen the morning (or you’re entertaining the idea!).
There is something powerful about starting the day off in the presence of the Lord, but if you’re not a morning person, don’t try to become one overnight. You can check out the next two parts of this series to learn about Afternoon Routines and Evening Routines.
Whatever time of day you prayerfully choose, ask the Lord to remove obstacles you may face day to day.
“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. ”
The Importance of Morning Routines for Moms
Our days need to be hemmed and wrapped in prayer. I don’t know about you, but my 24 hours seem longer, harder, and more tiresome when I forsake my time with the Lord.
If we want a day where we are keeping the Lord and His Word first and foremost in our minds, then we need to put the Lord first and foremost in our schedule.
Seeking the Lord first puts our minds in the right framework. We can give our control, worries, schedule, and hearts to the Lord when we seek Him first. Also, we can do a better job of mentally preparing for the day when we allow ourselves to bask in His glory with the sunrise.
When we wholly give ourselves over to Him first thing, we’re less likely to take ourselves back into our own control throughout the day.
Bible verses about morning prayer
Although we can seek the Lord at any time of day (and we should!) there is something encouraging about seeking the Lord in the morning. It is like wrapping the day up in a protective covering and shield, powered by the Lord. If you’re looking for Bible verses about morning prayer and seeking the Lord first, be inspired by these:
My voice You shall hear in the morning, O Lord; In the morning I will direct it to You, and I will look up. (Psalm 5:3 NKJV)
Let me hear in the morning of Your steadfast love, for in You I trust. Make me know the way I should go, for to You I lift up my soul. (Psalm 143:8 ESV)
I rise before dawn and cry for help; I hope in Your words. (Psalm 119:147 ESV)
But I will sing of Your strength; I will sing aloud of Your steadfast love in the morning. For You have been to me a fortress and a refuge in the day of my distress. (Psalm 59:16 ESV)
But I, O Lord, cry to You; in the morning my prayer comes before You. (Psalm 88:13 ESV)
10 Uncomplicated Steps to Creating a Productive Morning Routine
So, sister– let’s get into it! Your morning routine may look different than mine, but there are some basic things we can all do to create the ultimate morning routine for ourselves.
“If we want a day where we are keeping the Lord and His Word first and foremost in our minds, then we need to put the Lord first and foremost in our day.”
#1: Determine how much time you’d like to spend before the Lord.
There is no right or wrong answer to this! Set a loose goal for how much time you’d like to spend praying and in the Word. Be gracious with the amount of time, knowing that there will likely be things that cut the time shorter than you prefer.
#2: Set your alarm for at least 45 minutes before your children wake up.
Be sure to account for the timeframe you determined in Step #1, so you may need more than 45 minutes.
When we allow our children to be our alarm clock, we set ourselves up to begin the day frazzled. Not that our children are a constant cause of stress (!), but we as mothers need to remember that first, even before our motherhood, we are a daughter of God.
We need time to be His daughter, alone, before engaging in our role as a mom.
#3: Pray the night before.
If you’ve ever been a morning workout person, you know that one of the things that can help to ensure you follow through with your morning exercise is to set out your workout clothes the night before. I’ve even heard people say they sleep in their workout clothes!
The idea is that you need to determine the night before the things you will do in the morning. Thankfully as Christians, we have the power of the Holy Spirit to help us be accountable; we don’t have to do this in our own strength.
Before going to bed, say a short prayer, asking the Lord to give you strength and mental clarity in the morning, and to help you uphold your commitment to meeting with Him.
#4: Get up!
Don’t you dare hit that snooze button, sister! Turn your alarm ringtone to something that sounds pleasant and invigorating, and puts a smile on your face. Get up and get moving.
#5: Don’t waste time doing unnecessary tasks.
I love starting my day with a cup of coffee, but I don’t want it to be an extra chore in the morning. I typically prep the coffee maker the night before, so that at the crack of dawn, I only have to hit a button or two to get the joe flowing.
I also give you permission to ignore the leftover dishes in the sink, the room that needs tidying up, and the looming to-do list. It’s not time for that yet! First thing in the morning is primetime for the Lord.
#6: Hold off on the electronics.
I have Bible apps on my phone that I use during my study time, but other than that, all other apps are avoided until my time with the Lord is done. Do your best to ignore email and social media notifications. Don’t even open the apps– we all know how easy it is to get sucked into the digital world!
Outside media has a way of heavily distracting us from focusing on the Lord– not just in the morning, but throughout the day. Be mindful that you aren’t wasting your precious quiet time reading about everyone else’s life on Facebook or responding to emails. There is always time for that later.
#7: Prepare your study materials the night before.
Could you imagine diligently popping out of bed when the alarm clock rings, getting your coffee in a jiffy and eliminating all distractions– only to waste 15 minutes gathering your necessary study tools?
Whether it’s just your Bible (which is enough!), or your Bible along with a journal, pens, highlighters or study guides– place your study tools in your quiet time area the night before. Having everything ready to go removes the need to scurry around for it in the morning.
get the most out of your study time
Download this set of FREE Bible Study Printables to assist you during your quiet time! This 5-page download includes a place to take notes, create a weekly or monthly reading plan, and to capture verses that speak to your heart. Fill out the form below.
The less you feel you have to work to put your morning routine into motion, the more you’ll be motivated to stick with it.
#8: Pray before you get started.
This may seem obvious, but don’t miss it! Not only should you pray over what you’ll be reading and that the Lord will give you wisdom and understanding of His Word, but it’s also a good idea to pray over your morning routine itself.
Do you struggle with being extra tired as you read? Does your mind start to wander as you pray? Are you looking at the words of Scripture on the page, but mentally preparing your grocery list at the same time?
Pray and ask the Lord to give you undistracted (internally and externally) peace and quiet as you study.
And can I share a secret? I even pray that the Lord would keep my children asleep until I’m finished with what He wants me to read that morning!
#9: Focus. Focus. Focus.
Purpose to sit and be still for the entirety of your study time. I know your coffee needs warming. What was that noise upstairs, anyway? Ooops, there were clothes left in the washer last night that needed to be placed in the dryer. What time is that appointment, again?
All of those things can wait. The more you get up and interrupt yourself, the less you are soaking in what the Lord has for you. Your morning routine is not the time to multitask. Focus on hearing from the Lord, not on your present circumstances.
So, finish reading the verse, the passage, or the chapter. Whatever you felt led to study that morning, be diligent to stay put until you do so.
#10: Help your children start their day with the Lord.
You’ve just spent ample time with the Lord, and now your little blessings are awake. Will you forget everything the Lord revealed to you, or could you pass it along?
If appropriate, share a few truths with your little ones as they begin their day. Whether this is casually over breakfast, or in a devotional-type setting, getting your children in the habit of thinking about the Lord first and foremost sets them up to have their own quiet times as they get older.
Plus, we all know the best way to imprint what you’ve just learned is to not only take action on it, but to also teach it to someone else.
RELATED: How to Purposely Pray Over Your Children
Morning Routine: Bonus Thoughts for Working Moms
The 10 Tips above are coming from my perspective as a current, stay-at-home mom. I understand that it sounds easier said than done, depending on the number of children you have and their ages, and whether you work full-time or part-time, out of the house, or at home.
I remember how differently my morning routine looked when I was a mom working full-time, with two kids under the age of 4.
#1: Consider the Lord’s wisdom
For my working sisters, please know that although your mornings are probably busier, as you also must prepare for your day away from your children, the Lord will give you the wisdom to know how you can make spending time with Him a priority.
#2: Prior Proper Planning
Perhaps you do the bulk of your work-day preparation the night before:
Pick out your outfit (and your little one’s)
Shower
Prep and pack certain components of your lunch and school lunches
Pack the diaper bag
Prep the coffee maker
Maybe you have to get up an extra 20 minutes earlier to account for the time it takes to get dressed and do your hair and makeup; however, if many of these time-wasting tasks are handled the night before, you have much less to do in the morning!
#3: continue to converse with the lord
Work schedules can change, whether you have meetings or events; morning schedules can change when children are sick. But, as you continue to seek the Lord, you will see ways to make a productive morning routine possible. He’ll show you things you can change, adjust, or cut out so that He can be a priority.
The fact is that God wants us to seek Him and keep His Word, and He promises that those who do will be blessed (Psalm 119:2). Therefore, if you genuinely want to make the Lord a priority in your day, He will help you establish this time and sustain you through it.
“Blessed are those who keep His testimonies, who seek Him with their whole heart.”
Sister, we’ve got this.
As we work to set up a productive morning routine, please remember that it doesn’t have to be perfect. Things will arise. There will be unavoidable emergencies. Children will wake up a bit too early. You’ll get sick one morning and decide to stay in bed to get more rest.
Give yourself grace— because God does. He is always there, whether you missed your morning quiet time or not. He doesn’t move farther away throughout the day. He is waiting patiently for you to come to Him, seek Him, and spend time with Him.
So, although obstacles may come– don’t purposely stand Him up. Don’t leave Him hanging, sis. He’s your first love and He deserves to be honored.
Remembering that it’s all about Him, and not our perfect morning flow can help us start and stick with a morning routine that pleases and glorifies Him.
5 Surprising Ways Busy Moms Waste Time
Being a busy mom is a thing. But are we so busy that we are wasting time? Learning how to…
Did you ever grab your phone and hop online for a bit, maybe just to make a quick post or respond to a notification you received? Did you start this process at 7:00 pm and spend “5 minutes” on social media, only to realize that 5 minutes later was actually 7:30 pm?
Time is a mysterious thing, isn’t it? It “goes quickly” when we don’t want it to, yet “goes slowly” when we’re impatient.
Why, oh why does time change tempos according to our circumstances?
Of course, I’m being a bit facetious. We all have the same 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour, and 60 seconds in a minute. Time doesn’t actually change speeds, we just feel like it does in our minds. Based on the way we view our current situation, we believe we don’t have enough time, that time has gone by too quickly, or time is dragging.
It’s in our minds. In our choices.
You see, sister, we can waste time by the choices we make. Just like my example with social media above, we can easily let our minds get sucked into the moment and before we know it, the time flew by, as they say.
I’m sure you agree with me that wasting time isn’t good– especially in our role as mothers. Our motherhood needs to be attentive, effective, and productive– all to the extent that the Lord leads.
But, if we want to learn how to be productive and how to stop wasting time, we’ve got to pay attention to the decisions we’re making and the actions we’re taking. Are we letting our mind lead us, or are we allowing the Lord to lead us?
The speed of time won’t change– but we can.
How to Stop Wasting Time
Before we talk about how to be more productive as a mom, we need to look at what could be wasting our time. There are many things we choose to do that can get in the way of us making time for God, our spouse, and our children.
If you’re constantly feeling “spent” and like a weary mama, yes– it could just be the season you’re in; however, I also think it’s wise to look at what fills your day and consider whether or not you’re redeeming your time well.
5 things to stop doing today
If you’re wondering how to stop wasting time, here are a few tips:
#1: Stop giving yourself unlimited screen time.
One of the worst things parents can do is give their children screen time unleashed, right? Well, it’s the same for us, mom! Just as you do with your kiddos, you can schedule your own screen time and set a time limit.
Find a time of day that you set aside for social media, checking emails, and watching tv. As you do with any calendar appointment, do what you need to do on screens in that timeframe, and when time is up, time is up!
Maybe this is over lunchtime, naptime, or after the kids are in bed. Whatever the time, make it a habit to not look for the remote every moment you get bored or grab your phone at each notification ding. (Bonus Tip: Unless it hinders your job, business, or ministry, turn off your notification sounds for these apps so you aren’t tempted throughout the day!).
#2: Stop wasting downtime.
Yes, moms– we do have downtime! Seriously, we do. In these precious moments of downtime, you can find time to connect with the Lord through His Word. (Hopefully, this is bonus time if you’re aptly getting in good quiet time each day! If not, find 22 ways to make time for God, here.)
Download a Bible app onto your phone, like Blue Letter Bible, Bible Gateway, or YouVersion. While you’re third in line at the bank drive-thru, waiting at the grocery checkout, or watching something heat up in the microwave, open your app and read a verse or two.
If you’re struggling with a slight addiction to social media, move all of your social apps to a folder on your home screen, and put your Bible apps front and center so they’re more easily accessible. When you feel the itch to check your social feeds, practice opening your Bible app instead!
#3: Stop engaging in wasteful things.
Examine your life and find the timewasters. Maybe this is social media, TV time, hobbies, or unproductive relationships. Perhaps you simply need to limit the time spent in these areas, or they need cut out altogether. If there are things that are too distracting or pulling you from the Lord and your family– either mentally or physically– they may be wasteful.
#4: Stop saying ‘yes’ all the time.
If certain things aren’t in God’s will for your life, say no. Sister, we must learn to entrust our plans to the Lord.
Proverbs 28:26 tells us that when we trust in our own hearts we’re behaving foolishly; yet, there is safety in walking wisely.
I’ve heard it said many times that the safest place to be is in the will of God. I don’t believe this is just for the big decisions in life, like whether or not you should uproot your family and become missionaries in a foreign country. No– this is in the small things too— the everyday decisions that you think the Lord doesn’t care about, but He does.
He wants you to be in the center of His will 24 hours a day.
So, even if opportunities present themselves that look and sound good, that doesn’t always mean you should say yes.
The best of things can waste your time if they aren’t what the Lord has for you.
#5: Stop turning off your ‘productivity switch’ when your kids are occupied.
Limit your children’s screen entertainment time. This may seem like an odd suggestion; however, I’ve noticed that when my kids are allowed to veg out in front of the TV or on their tablets for an extended time, that is when I find myself becoming lazy. I start scrolling. I begin doing busy work that doesn’t matter.
When your children are available and ready to actively engage with you, you don’t have the luxury of getting sucked in by a time-waster.
Free Download:
These handy sheets walk you through the process of taking inventory of your daily activities to discover what is wasting your time.
Investigate your time wasters, then use the Prayer worksheet to prayerfully consider the Lord’s will in these areas of your life. Track how the Lord answers your prayers!
A warning about being Idle
I believe that learning how to stop wasting time is different than learning how to be more productive.
Removing time wasters isn’t enough. Learning how to stop wasting time means that we have to choose to eliminate distractions and things that cause us to go astray during our day.
But, once we do that, we have a bunch of empty holes. And, when there are too many empty slots in our schedule, we can become bored.
Yes, even as a stay-at-home mom, we can become bored. Even as a working mom. A homeschool mom. A ministry mom.
In all of these seasons of motherhood, there is always room in the emptiness or our “lack of interest” in the things of life that can lead us towards an enemy: idleness.
What does the Bible say about idleness?
The Bible mentions that the Proverbs 31 woman was diligent to watch over the affairs of her house. In doing so, she didn’t make time for idleness (Proverbs 31:27).
I’ve found that idleness leads to a lack of interest in the important aspects of life, especially spiritual things.
We begin to look for entertainment in a variety of ways, new endeavors, or friendships to give us something “interesting” to look forward to in our days.
Idleness takes our eyes off Jesus and puts them onto the things of the world.
Although Paul is addressing this issue in relation to young widows in 1 Timothy 5:13, what he says about being idle doesn’t only happen to widows. I believe it’s a warning to any of us who choose to have too much time on our hands:
“At the same time they also learn to be idle, as they go around from house to house; and not merely idle, but also they become gossips and busybodies, talking about things not proper to mention.”
What I’m about to say isn’t a slam on those who spend ample time on social media (I too have various social accounts!), but I’ve often thought— as I’ve read different posts or comments— that some people simply have too much time on their hands.
If we have time to engage in every bit of drama happening in our extended family, with our friends, and in the world, then my dear sister— dare I say, we are trapped in idleness.
We are striving to create something “exciting” in our lives.
As Paul says, this opens the door for us to become busybodies, gossips, and talk about things we ought not to. Does that sound like what you see sometimes on social media?
In short, idleness leads to other sins in our lives, and should be avoided at all costs.
How to be more productive every day
I know it seems as though I’m picking on social media a lot! I promise you, I’m not a certified hater of it. I am, however, not a fan of engaging in any form of entertainment that lets you lose track of time for hours on end because your mind is so occupied that nothing else can get past the wall.
So, whether it’s Facebook, movies, binge-worthy TV, the latest gossip magazines, and the list goes on– we need to be careful and let the Lord guard our hearts and minds against things that heavily distract us.
“Whatever you do in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father. ”
5 ways to boost your productivity
In order to be more productive every day, there are a few things you can do:
#1: Ask the Lord for guidance.
What does He want to use to fill in the holes? The worst thing you can do is start making your own plans and fill in your schedule with things you think are important. Instead, seek the Lord and ask Him what He intends for your life in this season. Allow Him to be your Master Planner.
#2: Get up early.
There are many benefits to rising early before your household, especially when you have little ones. Proverbs 31:15 tells us that the infamous Proverbs 31 woman did this so she could begin to prepare for the day.
Maybe you’re not an early riser, and that’s ok. Perhaps waking up a mere 20 minutes before your children will help you jumpstart your day and mentally prepare in a way that doesn’t allow when your children are your alarm clock.
Getting up early also gives you space to have quiet time with the Lord so you can begin your day wrapped in prayer and spending time in the Word.
#3: Prepare for the day ahead.
It’s easier to be more productive if we plan for tomorrow. Be ready for the meals you’ll cook. Look at the appointments on the calendar. Prepare school lunches, pick out your outfit, double-check the diaper bag– whatever tasks that seem mundane and only “take a few minutes”-- these are great things to get out of the way the night before.
Starting the day one step ahead always puts an extra pep in your step.
#4: Prayerfully create a schedule for yourself.
Following the Lord’s lead in what He has for your life today and in this season, create a schedule that works within those parameters. Whether it’s a daily, weekly, or monthly schedule, consider what needs to be done, and put a plan into action.
If you’re working on eliminating time wasters in your day, creating a daily schedule is a great way to be sure you’re focusing on fruitful things.
#5: Get organized.
If you’re already an organized person, you probably have this step down! If you’re typically not organized, finding the simplest area of your life to organize will help you in your desire to be more productive every day.
Perhaps laundry falls to the wayside. Create a simple weekly chart outlining the specific days you’ll do each person’s laundry in your household.
Or, maybe you’d like to concentrate on teaching your children some new life skills. Create a chore chart to help everyone stay on track.
Don’t overcomplicate organization. Start small, and move forward from there.
Being a “busy mom” is a thing, but…
Sister, learning how to stop wasting time is one of the most important things you can do.
Lean into the Lord and ask Him to help you avoid the areas of your life that aren’t pleasing to Him. Prayerfully consider what you need to do to be more productive every day.
Being productive isn’t about becoming busy for the sake of being busy. Every single block on your calendar doesn’t need to be filled in.
I was just explaining this concept to my older kids, as they tend to jump from one activity to the next, with no rest time in between.
Having a constant flow of input into your mind and stimulation to your body isn’t good either. We need time to mentally break and hear from the Lord in the quietness of our souls.
A packed calendar doesn’t allow for this. So beware, there is danger in having too much in our lives.
This is where you need to consider what the Lord has for you in your season– not just your overall season of life, but your minute-by-minute season as well.
…it’s better to be fully surrendered
I know being a “busy mom” is a thing, and so often that’s our reality. But, let’s not wear our busyness as a badge.
Let’s purpose to be fully surrendered to His plans, whether to be productive; or to be still, so we can be totally and completely in His will for our lives.
3 Ways Pride Manifests in Motherhood
Should I be a proud mom? I think this question crosses a lot of our minds when we think of our kids. There is nothing wrong with…
Recently my daughter and oldest son were playing a game where my daughter was a princess. They came to the dinner table and when I called her name to ask her to do something, she politely responded with a correction: “It’s Princess, mom.”
They continued their pretend play throughout dinner using their make-believe names, while my husband and I (the humble peasants, perhaps?) looked on.
After dinner, as usual, it was time for the kids to do their chores. As my daughter began to walk away from the table, I reminded her that it was her turn to sweep the floor.
“But I’m a princess,” she said. “Princesses don't do chores.” She said it with a smile, jokingly, and in character. I knew she was just being silly.
Unfortunately for her, my imagination switch wasn’t turned on at the moment. It had been a tiring day, I wasn’t feeling well, and even with the completion of their chores, I knew I still had clean-up work of my own to do. I needed to not be the one who also swept.
I gave her a look, and in all serious (with a little sass) I replied,
“Jesus is the King and He washed people’s feet.”
“Oh. Oh yeah.” With a slight grin in her “aha” moment, she did an about-face and marched to get the broom.
The proud mom throne
The truth is, many times as moms we are playing the same game. We’re princesses, or probably more accurately, queens of our own little established kingdom.
We may not talk ourselves out of cleaning or chores due to our royalty, but our throne manifests itself in various other ways.
Our throne is so shiny that oftentimes we don’t recognize it for what it is. Because of this, it can easily get out of hand and infiltrate multiple areas of our lives, especially motherhood.
I’m talking about pride. Let’s chat about this.
What is pride?
We normally think of pride as thinking too highly of ourselves and acting accordingly. When we’re prideful, we tend to live and play by our own rules and expect everyone else to follow suit.
Or, perhaps it leads to a feeling of entitlement— thinking we are owed something because of who we are or what we’ve accomplished.
Dare I say, pride can also come at the other end of the spectrum. When we think too lowly of ourselves, think we aren’t good enough, or how we are not up to par compared to others, that is also pride. Why?
When we think we aren’t good enough compared to others, that is saying that we believe God made us incorrectly. We are saying we think that if He’d done a better job, we’d be better off.
The proud mom
Should I be a proud mom? I think this question crosses a lot of our minds when we think of our kids. There is nothing wrong with being proud of our children when they do good things, get good grades, achieve in sports, or we catch them displaying godly character traits in their interactions with friends.
These things are all well and good and can be used to honor the Lord.
But, this isn’t the type of pride we’re talking about. There is a type of proud mom that hinders more than helps our motherhood.
Pride comes before the fall
The dangerous pride is what is warned about in the Bible. This is the pride that leads to destruction (Proverbs 16:18). It puts us in a position where we think we know best, even better than God. Even if we don’t use those exact words, typically that is the attitude behind pride.
Yet, if you were to look up Bible verses about pride, you’d see clearly that the Lord opposes the proud (James 4:6) and in fact, the proud are eventually torn down.
Did you hear the one about the guy who turned into an ox?
King Nebuchadnezzar’s story in the book of Daniel has always been interesting to me. Such a powerful and prideful man, Nebuchadnezzar was considered the greatest king of the Babylonian Empire.
This is the same Nebuchadnezzar who built a tall, gold statue of himself and demanded everyone bow down to it. When Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego didn’t, they were thrown into the fiery furnace.
Sometime after this event, however, he is given a dream that Daniel interprets for him. The dream shows him that he needs to humble himself and recognize that the Lord rules, and He is the source of power, greatness, and wealth.
Unfortunately, Nebuchadnezzar doesn’t seek humility and after 12 months, as he is proclaiming his greatness aloud, a voice speaks to him from heaven, God passes judgment on him for his pride, and:
Immediately the word was fulfilled against Nebuchadnezzar. He was driven from among men and ate grass like an ox, and his body was wet with the dew of heaven till his hair grew as long as eagles' feathers, and his nails were like birds' claws (Daniel 4:33).
Ok, so maybe he didn’t literally turn into an ox! But talk about quite a judgment! Nebuchadnezzar spent the next 7 years of his life this way until he finally humbled himself before the Lord and gave praise and honor where it was due (Daniel 4:34-35).
“Now I, Nebuchadnezzar, praise and extol and honor the King of heaven, for all his works are right and his ways are just; and those who walk in pride he is able to humble. ”
What pride looks like in motherhood
Just as we see in Nebuchadnezzar’s life, pride keeps us from doing what’s right. When you’re a proud mom, you start to make your own decrees in your own little kingdom.
Pride creates an obstacle to God’s grace in your life because He gives grace to the humble, not the proud.
Once Nebuchadnezzar humbled himself, the Lord gave him grace, restoring to him his kingdom, his majesty, the favor of his counselors, and as he narrates, still more greatness was added to me (Daniel 4:36).
Still more greatness. That’s God’s grace.
Mama, I’m here to tell you– heavy is the head that wears the crown. I know. I’m on my throne too, right next to you. Let’s learn a lesson from an ancient king, and at the same time examine our own lives.
Pride in motherhood looks like a few of these things:
#1: We use the phrase, “Because I told you so,” too often.
There is a difference between discipline or training up our children, and barking out orders. The things we’re telling or asking our kids to do should have a reason behind them, and depending on their age, it should be a reason that can be explained to them.
Now, I know there are times when it’s warranted to use this phrase, and our children should obey because that’s what they’re called to do.
However, when we see ourselves as the queens of the castle, it’s easy to simply throw out commands all day and expect our humble servants to follow suit.
Be led by the Spirit
As we allow the Holy Spirit to lead us in our parenting, we will find patience, gentleness, and self-control. We will find the humility to stoop down to their level and help them understand what we’re asking them to do and why– which oftentimes allows them to see the importance of the task.
On the opposite, when we tell our kids what to do all day without any training or explanations, we’re simply teaching them to only obey rules for the sake of obeying rules and a ruler.
Is obedience important? Yes! The Lord calls children to obey their parents (Ephesians 6:1) and we are called to obey the Lord. But, doesn’t the Lord make His “whys” clear to us in the full counsel Scripture? Has He not sent the Spirit to dwell in us to help us understand and direct us in the things He calls us to do?
If the Lord Almighty on His throne is willing to be patient with us as we walk out obedience, should we not do the same with the children with whom He’s entrusted us?
#2: Our worth as a mom is wrapped up in our children
It may be surprising to hear that pride in motherhood comes in the form of your children determining your worth as a mom.
Maybe, based on how well they behave or what others think of them, we form a belief of “how good of a mom” we are.
Or perhaps, it correlates to how you choose to raise your kids: how organic or homemade their food and snacks are, whether they’re homeschooled or in the classroom, or the activities in which they’re involved.
If your teen goes through a rebellion phase, you feel your worth diminishes.
If your child graduates as an academic achiever and star athlete, you feel all the more worthy.
Mama, take off the crown. These are all false feelings, made-up standards, and lies. Worth is found in Christ and Christ alone.
Our worth is found in the One who is worthy
Before we were born, He formed us in our mother’s womb (Psalm 139:13).
Even when we were still dead in our sin, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8).
And in Him, we are blessed with every spiritual blessing, chosen, holy and blameless before Him, adopted, redeemed, forgiven, and have an inheritance sealed with the Holy Spirit (Ephesians 1:3-14).
Nowhere in any of those verses does it say that we have to be a mom to obtain these blessings and promises. It also doesn’t say that our kids’ behavior at the mall yesterday taints any of them.
He is our all in all and from whom our worth and value come. It doesn’t fade or wrinkle.
But, when we think our identity and worth are wrapped up in the actions of our children, that is pride. It’s pride because inadvertently we are saying that how we have raised them is the key factor in determining our value.
The problem is, however, that our kids change and grow. Their character changes, sometimes for the better, and sometimes for the worse.
Yet, God created us with value, and if He is the one who sustains us and He doesn’t change, then our value and worth don’t change either. He redeemed us. And upon accepting that redemption in Christ, we are given a whole slew of other benefits and blessings.
It has nothing to do with us.
#3: We’re easily disappointed when our kids don’t live up to our expectations.
Comparison is a dangerous thing. We can easily find ourselves scrolling through social media, holding up the reflection of our lives against our friends or those we follow. We can have discussions with other moms from our children’s school and compare their kids’ academic abilities, behavior, socialization skills, and athleticism with our kids’.
Maybe it’s comparison that creates unnecessary expectations for our children.
Or, maybe it’s the latest parenting advice we received from a professional, or every other mom on the block who has happily given us her opinion.
Then there is the way we were raised. We can easily look back at our childhood, contemplate the good and the bad, the wishes and wants we had, and impose them on our kids.
We expect them to live a certain way, behave a certain way in public, and have certain kinds of friends. And, when our children miss the mark, we’re disappointed.
Do you expect too much?
You see, mama, the rules and decrees we’ve created can sometimes serve little purpose. It’s ok to be intentional and mindful in your parenting– in fact, it’s typically a good idea!
But, when we take these mindsets a too far, expecting our little kingdom to look a certain way inside of the house, and to present itself perfectly outside of the house, we’re in the danger zone.
Here, we’re at risk of concealing God’s grace in our everyday lives with the expectations in our do’s and don’t’s, and the failure behind our disappointment. It stifles the ability of our kids to see God’s hand moving in their lives in situations where they struggle or are weak because instead of seeing God’s grace, all they can think about is how they plucked a head of grain on the Sabbath and they shouldn’t have done that.
Expectations lead to weariness
Too many expectations leave our kids feeling overwhelmed and under pressure. And, mama, if we’re constantly feeling disappointed with our children’s conduct, we’re also likely feeling weary and we need to take a look at our own methods.
Let’s be sure the rules and expectations we’re placing on our children are age-appropriate, biblical, and profitable in our training of them in the way they should go.
Proud mom or boast in the Lord?
Mama, we can do this. We can step down from our thrones. We can toss the crowns to the side. Right now, as we are here on this earth, let’s show our children that the King of kings has His rightful place on the throne in our hearts. Let’s display His kingdom, not our imaginary one.
Let’s show our children that it is Him who has done all things for us– He gives life, He provides, He leads the way, and He sustains us.
We are not a force to be reckoned with or someone to bow down to. When we are living as proud moms, we’re blocking our children’s view of the throne. His throne.
Step aside.
As we do, in our humility, He will exalt us in due time.
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